Rooms Full of Headaches

 

I have spent

the last

63 days

lying in bed

in the dark

Staring at

The ceiling

And the four walls around me

Because the moon

Has been casting

Shadows upon them

And all I can think about is how

Syd Barrett was a 

Schizophrenic

Dropping acid 24/7

And feeding it to his cats

God, he was a brilliant man

And God,

We are all brilliant people

But somehow

I still lay here

Paralyzed by the thought of

Getting out from under

These flannel bed sheets

And facing the world

It has been 

1512 hours since

My feet have touched the floor

And 1513 hours since my

Thoughts have been 

Coherent 

 

Author's Note

I wanted to write something raw; something messy. Lately, my thoughts have been all over the place and I think this describes my situation perfectly. I know it is not my best piece, but I can't help but smile for not wanting to edit it. Sometimes it is better to just leave it as it is.

Reviews

[Tom Stash]

Ha, like the way it captures the scattershot nature of how your mind works when you're lying in bed late at night with your thoughts keeping you awake. Not sure whether that's the intention, but that's what it suggests to me.

[Lucifer Jones]

Messy? Maybe a smidge... Thoughts and emotions aren't always orderly. But all I see is the chaotic beauty and pain from which you write and the words flow... Very well done. You make the reader feel for the subject and desire to reach out. So very well done!

[Astro]

I think we all feel this way sometimes, that the safest place to be is in bed*asleep or not* As far as the poem goes, I'm with you in regards to not wanting to edit or revise. Most of my work on here is the same, once written it is what it is, raw, mine, original expression of an idea or series of ideas. The format works as individual thoughts that tie into each other and play out like they do in reality, with presence often being overcome by imagination or pondering. I am often in a state of either omnipresence where I am thinking about one or more things but also conducting myself in a social setting with varying degrees of ease, or vacantly staring off oblivious to the world around me for whatever whim my mind catches hold of. I like the addition of the Syd Barrett scenario to the voice of the poem, for those who know of him they will understand the madness inherent in his story. Although, I'm not sold on the idea that it was LSD that caused his Schizophrenia. That is neither here nor there. You have written something very good here as it expresses well that tendency to feel as though solitude and the preference to solitude is a madness all its own.

[Buddhistboy73]

An honest portrayal of a common human experience.....thanks for sharing. This can shed hope and light onto others lives...I love the idea of counting the hours in this poem especially...
BB

[J.L Hunter]

Wow... I really felt the insanity growing with each line. Great job.

[Emmy]

I can relate to the feeling! Nice poem

[Laura Harrison]

Well this was definitely raw! And as Broken. said, I like the fact that it is messy. Good job :)

[Raj]

Its something coming from heart. That's why making other to read it. Good work.but as you marked there is a potential for even better. Congratulations.

[Broken.]

I love the fact that its messy, it makes it seem more down-to-earth and intriguing; I want to read on and learn more about this character. Love the structure as well, I think it fits the tone of the poem perfectly. Great piece.

Broken.