Blistered Peeling Paint

Looking for forgiveness ...

Blistered Peeling Paint

How pitiless this weakened psyche

To ever consider in contemplation

That all life’s conscious moments

Were exercised in furious vain

 

Time, in unrepentant ruthlessness

Has taken revenge on misspent youth

All wounds of shortcomings hauntingly

Exposed by unforgiving worldly elements

 

An overwhelming gripping affinity

Permeates throughout this shattered shell

As slowly I identify a squandered existence

To the window’s blistered peeling paint

 

Curling back the fasciae of my life

Gloss fading from a weathered brow

With living, less before me than behind

I lay bare in testimony my wickedness

 

Seeking exoneration from shadowed thoughts

Bleaching clean with virtuous undertakings

Sanding down an over inflated ego

Ready for a new coat of righteous paint

 

Phill (ozofee) @ 2011

Reviews

[SM Davis]

Curling back the fasciae of my life
Gloss fading from a weathered brow
With living, less before me than behind
I lay bare in testimony my wickedness

Phil I have to say that I am not surprised, but I am ABSOLUTELY pleased to read this. There is a vulnerability here that exudes the strength of character. I absolutely loved this! 1000 peaches!

[Larry Dyson]

is a prose offereing all to itself..."

Curling back the fasciae of my life

Gloss fading from a weathered brow

With living, less before me than behind

I lay bare in testimony my wickedness



Seeking exoneration from shadowed thoughts

Bleaching clean with virtuous undertakings

Sanding down an over inflated ego

Ready for a new coat of righteous paint"

[MichelleSun]

that is wonderful. every word seems very well thought out. every single word and that is the making of a good writer.

[The Random Writings Of ..]

I love the evolving in this piece, a growth and a realization that moving forward is a step in the right direction. I love the analogies used to represent the underlying pain and and lost soul.
"An overwhelming gripping affinity
Permeates throughout this shattered shell
As slowly I identify a squandered existence
To the window’s blistered peeling paint"
This stanza - speaks powerfully to me, as it shows an epiphany, truly growing throughout the piece. Like a flower blooming.
Very thought provoking piece. Thank you for sharing your feelings - sorry it has taken to long for the review.

[Dezaraye]

I love this! It's such a beautiful piece of examination and discovery. The work is hard, but the effort well worth the end result. What a beautiful work of art is waiting at the end!

[Helen Woodward]

Beautifully said with humility and an honest account of self. Examination of conscience is a deeply cleansing life force that keeps us on the road less traveled...
Poetry in motion :-))))

Blesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

[Greg the Bard]

I find the word sometimes getting in the way of the thoughts.It's as if I had to consentrate harder to get the imagery from your work. I found that if I read the lines in reverse order that I got much mor imagery. Otherwised I liked this a lot.

[gmwoody22]

This has a lyrical quality. Very powerful. I cannot articulate it right now, but there is something about that line, To the blistered peeling paint, that hits you as you read...kind or like it doesn't fit with the style, but without it, the poem would be lessened.

[Lilly Negoi]

i was just about to express my awe about your
"Curling back the fasciae of my life
Gloss fading from a weathered brow"
when i noticed that SM Davis wrote about it :). splendid command of imagery!

[Kasey Klein]

nicely done