the Suitcase

 

Suitcase in a Tree

You threw in a froth of white
with a cloud soft cover up
and he was laughing,
holding up boxers with pitchforks.
The bed was covered with brochures,
and you both had your own ideas
of all the things you wanted to happen..
but look at this, it is evening now
and the suitcase is in a tree
and your yard has a choice
of items, laid open for inspection.
You are screaming out the window
and he is a drive by shouter,
burning rubber for emphasis,
and the suitcase is upside down,
planned activities drooping
from the old birch tree,
and you want to know what
happened, and you keep crying,
it was gonna be a perfect day,
but it is life, baby, it is life,
some of us are just built that way.

 

Reviews

[LJW]

I can almost picture this as being narrated by the old girlfriend or ex-wife of the man in this equation with the new woman. :-)

It almost never turns out as it's supposed to, does it?

[W.k.kortas]

All the folks who have proceeded me here are correct; it's wonderfully visual, extremely tight, and a brilliant combination of craft and imagination. It is the full package.

[Jibey]

A cleverly composed depiction of dreams that are never realised, of promises thqat are not kept... Your writing has such strength and is so well finished...

[Donald Meikle]

It's amazing what some people can do with truth. Ed's right. Paint us more pictures darlin'

[Ed Hart]

you just keep getting better and better...

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

That was quite unique and interesting... I take away the whole idea that life is not perfect and things don't always go according to plan so you got to roll with the punches... I really like this.