Dead Clown

SCENE 1. INT. A TUBE TRAIN CARRIAGE. NIGHT.

MAN 1 AND MAN 2 GET ONTO THE TUBE AND SIT NEXT TO EACH OTHER. THE CARRIAGE IS EMPTY EXCEPT FOR A DEAD CLOWN SAT OPPOSITE THEM.

 

MAN 1:

Here, there's a dead clown in that chair

 

MAN 2:

I’d noticed that. The moment I sat down I thought to myself: “Look at that dead clown sat there.” He rather draws the eye doesn’t he?

 

MAN 1:

He does. He’s not very funny is he?

 

MAN 2:

No.

 

MAN 1: (to clown)

Tell a joke!

 

MAN 2:

He won’t.

 

MAN 1:

Not even a little bit of slapstick?

 

MAN 2:

It’s unlikely. He’s dead, you see.

 

MAN 1:

How do you know he's dead?

 

 

MAN 2:

Well, when I poke him in the ribs with this stick look... Nothing happens.

 

POKES CLOWN WITH STICK. NOTHING HAPPENS.

 

MAN 1:

Yeah I see. Shame. Have another go.

 

MAN 2:

Ok.

 

POKES CLOWN AGAIN WITH STICK. NOTHING HAPPENS.

 

MAN 1:

It’d be nice if he just did something.

 

MAN 2:

It would, but that’s one of the things about the dead. They don’t get up to much. And generalised clowning is counted included within that.

 

MAN 1:

Why do you even have a stick?

 

MAN 2:

Just in case.

 

MAN 1:

In case of what?

 

 

MAN 2:

Well, you never know what you’re going to find on the tube at night.

 

MAN 1:

I still don't get the joke.

 

MAN 2:

That's how you know he's a comic genius.  This sort of humour is far too sophisticated for the likes of you and I.

 

MAN 1:

Shame.

 

MAN 2:

It is.

 

MAN 1:

I expect sophisticated sorts find this hilarious.

 

MAN 2:

It’s unlikely.

 

END

 

 

Author's Note

A sketch