Rolling over,
slumped; I strayed, asleep with my thoughts.
I was being taken places through my own small world. Around my surroundings, I began to notice
differences all around myself, small things not of any consequential
reasoning. There was reason though. There was reason all around. I found it in the way my sheets felt as I
pulled across my bed and how the space felt lighter. How the light shown through my curtain was
more of a light than it had ever been and how I began finding mystery in the
bottom of my coffee mugs. The dust under
my feet and along the top of my lesser used belongings gave me a newfound
comfort, along with the way I sought out my toes. There had to be secret. A reason why my fingers could tingle and my
mouth now formed a beamed smirk at the time shown on my bedside clock. I knew there had to be a secret, and I knew
that I knew what it was. I knew why the
space around me felt lighter; the reason it no longer felt heavy and lost. I had a secret which could be a reason and
became my key. Secrets and keys are very hard to keep; secrets are always
stolen and keys are always lost. I
hadn’t had my secret stolen or my key lost.
The only thing I could do was loll in the glow of the light cast across
my walls and onto your face. I can only and have only done this many times,
knowing that you are why the space is no longer heavy and why my fingers can
tingle. You are the mystery at the bottom of my coffee mug and the thin sheet
of dust covering my lesser belongings. Your tussled Brown hair is the
background of my life, the faint touches of speech you let out while sleeping
is the soundtrack to my mornings. The
fluency of your movements across the mattress could be a performance all in it's
own. Every flutter of your eyelid and
rise and fall of your chest, you fill my world with light. I miss you. "Anna
It’s been far too long, it’s been so long.
Anna, why have you gone where I cannot follow? Why did you go? Leaving only small traces of yourself behind;
I’m trying to find you. Anna, every day
I find your voice nuzzled between the sheets of my bed. I can feel you moving
and shifting your way through our bed, I imagine you climbing over the walls of
our bedroom. Anna, I miss you. I miss
each distinct sound you made when you were writing and trying hard to
concentrate. I miss the sound your fingers made when they keyed the line you
were finally pleased with. I miss waking
and falling asleep with you by my side.
I miss the sand on the beach and the sand caught in our hair. I want to
find you and be the reason your space is lighter. I wish I could really be what
was in the bottom of your coffee cup. Poured every morning into something you’d
spend the whole day with. I wish to
spend a whole day with you. Anna, come
home. I miss you. "Jacob