"Drinking Yuengling"

The Great Flash Fiction Experiment

“Drinking Yuengling”

Flash Fiction Piece; by Mr. Deft Diction

 

                For the first few days of my unemployment, I would wake up at six forty-five.  I’d make myself a fresh pot of Joe, with plenty of time left for another cup after I finished my morning workout.  I’d hit the tube and see who’d been found guilty of fuckery; and those who’d been�"at least as far as I could tell�"charged with crimes of cuckoldry.  Wondering aloud at times, how I could become gay and insignificant enough to be blessed with enough money to buy who, and whatever I wanted.  All the while never having to be the real me, which was broke on a Tuesday, drinking Yuengling.

 

                About two weeks into the routine, I called up my old boss and gave him my two weeks’ notice.  You know, to try and make it look official and all when I went to apply at some place that didn’t exist yet.  He played along and said he knew already, and appreciated my constant service to the organization’s missions, which was really nothing more than stealing back from people who stole from the people who hire us to get it back.  Okay, maybe a ‘thank you’ was in order.  However, he stopped short of offering me my job back, unless I was going to come back at the original peanut pay.  And well, gathering the nerve to bust into your boss’s office and demand a raise is already risky enough.  I’d also have to apologize for stabbing him six times with the letter opener the office chipped in to buy him for his birthday.

 

                But dad knows he should never be caught porking any of my women.  And I wish I could go back to that second right before I opened the door, and found him mounted atop my wife like some old dog going out on top with one last ride.  Maybe, maybe next Monday he’ll forgive me.  For now, I’m just broke on a Tuesday, drinking Yuengling.

 

Reviews

[jen]

Reading this makes wish I could write well. The title pulled me because I have actually toured the Yuengling brewery (it's the oldest one I think). Beyond the catchy title I found myself identifying, if just in the theme of it and wishing I could give my 2 weeks and watch Netflix until I feel like moving again.
So much story fit so neatly into this small package. I enjoyed it very much.

[Mr. Deft Diction]

Thank you for the read! Yes, Yuengling does have a lot of history; which was totally NOT what I thought about when I wrote the piece. But, in that history, I think that there's something identifiable about naming the beer, rather than not....

Thank you for your warm review.