Time's Log

written using the Urenga parameters for Poeticpiers challenge

 

Time's Log   Time chatters nonsense. No one can stop the ticking of the clock. Youth spins toward old age. Knowing each yesterday was once today, Tomorrows race on by. Youth spins toward old age. Knowing each yesterday was once today, Tomorrows race on by. Hoping for a bloom, Today’s new seeds root future dreams. Hoping for a bloom, Today’s new seeds root future dreams. In minutes between, Chatter fills the empty spaces Leaving time’s log short in pages.   By Sharon Miller Bolander    © 2009 Peggy Paris  (All rights reserved)

Reviews

[JohnL]

I think I vote for this as the winner of the contest.

But I argue with (maybe because I never pass up a good opportunity to alliterate, child that I am):

'Time chatters nonsense.
No one can stop the ticking of the clock.'

I don't suggest you alter anything - I just tell you what came into my head (and I do understand that your clock is a metaphoric one) how about?

"Clocks chatter nonsense
No one can stop the ticking of time."

I speak from experience - I have a drawer full of clocks and watches some stopped, some going, some right, some wrong all talking nonsense, but slowly and inexorably, in the back of my mind, I hear Time's ruthles pendulum, swung by 'Old Father' as he approaches me with his scythe. I just hope he may trip over his beard before he gets to me.
John

[Salvatore Buttaci]

Congratulations for winning the Urenga contest!

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

Congrats on your first place win.

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

very well done, as always

[SilentDream]

Very nice use of the form :)
I enjoyed reading

((Hugs and LOve)) ~SilentDream

[Salvatore Buttaci]

From the first strong line to the last, your poem resonates with win-worthiness!

[Masq]

Awesome presentation! Outstanding write. You followed the guidelines and delivered a quality piece deserving of a win. I haven't read all of the other entries, but I am very impressed thus far!

[angelina neves]

wondeful!