A Midnight's Walk

Just a little ditty that I wrote when a friend and I were playing improv poetry.

Walking up a moonlit path, amidst a darkened sky,

Watching as the birds gently sleep, and the fireflies brightly fly.

Resting for a moment, on a stump of wood,

Staring at the stars above,  I suddenly understood,

That I was so small, in a world so vast and wide.

And only a loving God could let me here reside.

Because I am undeserving of a gift so high,

 

Of the stars so bright, the sleeping birds, and the fireflies that fly.

 

         by Pauline Marie Daley

                July 28th, 2008

Reviews

[Everett DeValle]

Wonderfully written...love impromptu writes that spurs the imagination. Thank you for sharing.

[Dream Weaver]

Just one word "Enchanting"

[R J Askew]

The title drew me to this one. But I have just read NO MORE PAIN and of the two I think that one is far stronger, at least of the two that is the one bossing my mind. The title of the other poem just makes me wonder: if there is no more pain is there also no more pleasure? This no-pain-no-pleasure view of life was Marcus Aurelius' view of things. And is the brick work to keep in or to keep out? That poem makes the reader work more than this one I think. Just one view of course.

[Rain]

I think it's so cool you wrote this excellent piece just walking with a friend. I would walk with this friend more often. lol. I loved this. Rain..

[Mogan]

Good work, I like how you don't trip up if you speak it aloud. Good Rhythm! I like it!

[The Boss]

o mah gooness thass the dankest thang i eer read gurl!!

[Michael]

Very nice work, it flows much like something by William Butler Yeats. Well, it has that feel to it. Often shorter works are panned by people "wanting more" I like the room the give us to make them our own.

Simply wonderful!

[steve allen griffin]

That it a very beautiful poem........ I could almost feel the night air and see everything you so elegantly describe. Flows wonderfully ... and I love how the end swings back around from the beginning. Awsome!

[FRANK]

This poem is amazing. I love the way that you develop your metephors into rhymes that come across so well. This piece is not contrived in any way whatsoever. I particularly love the way that you begin with "Walking up a moonlit path, amidst a darkened sky." That is very touching.

I also love the way that you have chosen to end this piece. Wow!

Frank

[Tony Hwilka]

A very peaseful poem. If I can suggest something. Change world to universe would make the poem stronger I think. Only a opinion