The Fridge

Monday

                It has come to my attention, that someone has been stealing from

                the communal fridge. I notice that my own personal milk with my

                name on the bottle is half empty, also three fingers of my KitKat

                are missing. Please refrain, or action will be taken.

Tuesday

                It has come to my attention, and I’m pleasantly surprised to see

                my milk has been topped up, though, why two fingers of my

                KitKat  in a V sign just beggars belief. Just tasted my milk, you

                dirty b*****d. I will now be monitoring the fridge from my office.

                You will be caught.

Wednesday

                 

                  It has come to my attention, the camera monitoring the fridge

                  is now monitoring the ladies toilet. This is intolerable, you are

                  usurping my authority. Heads will roll. I will now be moving the

                  fridge into my office until further notice.

Thursday

 

                  It has come to my attention, my office has been penetrated,

                  the fridge is missing, and I find a ransom note on my desk.

                  I don’t know who you people think you're dealing with, but

                  let me leave you in no doubt, I will find out who you are, and

                  You will be dismissed.

Friday

 

                  It has come to my attention, a delivery of fifty fridges is

                  cluttering up the whole building, management is going

                  ballistic. I concede to your demands, please get rid of

                  them. Let us get back to you taking my milk and my biscuits,

                  my job, my life. Just leave me alone.

         Thankyou.

Reviews

[Einstein Noodle]

:))))))))))))))) anyone who has worked someplace with the "Community Fridge" knows just how these things go .... downhill in a hurry :))))))))))))))))) keep staying safe and well Paul ... and keep your humor too!
E.

[Paul Bell]

You too, Einstein, summer is around the corner, hopefully we'll be allowed out to see it.

[Einstein Noodle]

i hear ya! ... we'll get there!

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Love your poem
I’ve worked in hospital admin for the last thirteen years and believe it or not in all that time of putting stuff in fridges in numerous t rooms in diff depts at work not once was anything stolen
Maybe it’s a health worker hospital Honesty thing
Anyway great poem
I love mars bars

[Paul Bell]

Health workers are gold, they've not got time to use the fridge now. Everyone working in hospitals should be given a blank cheque.

[Dave Brown]

It is real good to see someone finally write about these various Fridge issues
My wife's wanting to purchase a new Fridge.
She's already having a chocolate cookie problem.
I'd better mention the KitKat thingy

[Paul Bell]

Some of those fridges are amazing now, you could make chocolate in them. Mention the kitkat thingy to your wife and she might lop something off.

[Dave Brown]

we are next door to 80 yrs.
Both sight and accuracy have become failing entities.
I hope

[.]

This sounds like justice for every disgruntled employee who ever had an a*****e for a boss. That opening line..."It has come to my attention...." is just so appropriate for these office Nazis. If it was up to me, i would have taken the whole KitKat and left the wrapper in place with a note saying, "It has come to my attention that people are leaving litter inside the office fridge. Please refrain from doing so and place your rubbish in the appropriate place. Thank you". A dose of his own medicine. I enjoyed the humour in this one, Paul.

[Paul Bell]

He sure never complained again. lol

[jacob erin-cilberto]

the Kit Kats, that is the last straw...i won't cry over spilled milk, but will roar my disapproval if someone touches my Kit Kat...favorite candy bar.
my fridge is full, my heart empty...
she took my soul.
j.

[Paul Bell]

Don't know what's happened to the chunky KitKat, it has suddenly got smaller and smaller.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

How dare they!!!!???
it's time for Mutiny...

fridges of the world unite.

[Paul Bell]

My fridge is wondering why I've got so much emergency beer and no exit plan.

[gram linski]

brought a smile on this dreich day, Paul, well done, liked the KitKat line

[Paul Bell]

Summer is round the corner from the window.

[gram linski]

aye but it is outside, lol,

[Travis Gibson (poetic h..]

Some things are best left alone, huh? My father made sure to tell his boisterous young man to pick his battles wisely... a lesson learned the hard way! lol great write, and thanks for sharing!

[Paul Bell]

The fridge is a battleground, only the brave survive.