The Device

Mandy, am I right in thinking you wear a brassiere.

We just call them bra’s, Paul, cuts out the middleman, and as you can see, yes.

Right, is there any chance I could borrow one of your bra’s.

Most guys go for the knickers, why do you want a bra.

I want to put something in it.

That is gross, no wonder Jenny dumped you.

She didn’t dump me for that.

So what is it then, are you obsessed with my breasts.

No, I’m not obsessed with your breasts.

Why not, what’s wrong with them.

Nothings wrong with them, they’re great.

That is so inappropriate for senior management I’ve got a good mind to report you.

I want to put a device in your bra, and if the response is what I know it will be I’ll offer you fifty percent in my new company.

That sounds intriguing, Paul, so what do I have to do.

Just give me one of your bra’s, I’ll put the device in it, you go home and put it on. They’re three settings on it, so start at one and see how you get on.

Should I include Joe in this experiment.

Well, the more feedback the better.

Next day. So, what’s the feedback.

I put Joe in hospital that’s the feedback.

What, what the hell did you do.

I put it on setting one, and after a few minutes I felt this tingling sensation, and that just put me in the mood. Then I got Joe into bed and turned it onto setting two. My god I was demanding sex in every position conceivable, it was fantastic like out of this world, so then I went to position three as I was straddling him on the kitchen table. It sent me mental, I must have scratched and punched him to a pulp cos he was unconscious when I came round. 

Right, so maybe we should get rid of position three.

No, I was thinking we could market position three for S and M clients.

That is a great executive decision, Mandy, I can see this company going from strength to strength.

One thing, Paul, why can’t you put this device in woman’s knickers, would that not work just as well.

It did work just as well, Mandy. I gave a pair to Jenny, and she dumped me two days later with the words. You are now surplus to requirements.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Definitely one of your best stories & also a great punchline. Your outlandish humor is what's sorely needed in our swirling cesspool of virus & fomenting. I wonder if people are even having sex anymore? Geez! How socially distant have people gotten, anyway? Maybe we need your device in our knickers, after all! *wink! wink!* Fondly, Margie

[Paul Bell]

Sex two metres apart, foreplay in different States, what the hell happened. Still not getting the knicker device, guys will be needed once this is over.

[barleygirl]

I said YOUR device in my knickers, in case you didn't catch it . . .

[Paul Bell]

You only said that cos you know I'm grounded. lol

[.]

Very witty this one, Paul! It really hits the funnybone for me. I just wonder what that device looks like? In any event i don't think any man would want to divulge that secret, lest the human population withers from its wonderful effects! You have created a very humorous piece here, well done! Much enjoyed! :))

[Paul Bell]

They might divulge it if they all end up in hospital. lol

[Einstein Noodle]

Pual................i love your back and forth style and stories .... just full of good human humor ...... and devices of all kinds .... what a great uplifting read for my first one this morning :) thanks for sharing sir! Sorry it backfired on you as far as Jenny is concerned ... but hey ... you own the company ... she has the trial model .... she'll have to come back to you in one way or another ... when the batteries die :)))))))))))
E.

[Paul Bell]

Right on, Einstein, Jenny's fun time has got to come to an end at some point. lol

[Rania M]

At least he didn't get to the hospital. Jenny seems an angel.
Lol. I have a great idea. How about we try it on men for double-trouble?

[Paul Bell]

I'll give you the pleasure of writing that one, Rania.
Though us guys are a bit dim, so anything that gets us going is appreciated.

[Rania M]

I’m rolling around with big belly jerking laughs. Thinking of me writing the sequel. Aww.

[Paul Bell]

It can only be brilliant.