Paranoia

There’s a woman on the phone who says she’s pregnant, explanation.
Well, in simple terms, the man has to impregnate the woman, this may take several occasions, but you get the gist.
Oh, I get the gist alright, so how many occasions did it take.
Well, it's hardly the thing you talk about when you’re planning a baby.
What, how long has this been going on.
How would I know, might be one night, might be long-term, why don't you ask her.
I’m not asking your floosie things like that, you should know.
Typical woman, just because a pregnant woman is on the phone, you naturally assume the worse.
I have reason to assume the worse, the neighbours bed you assembled.
Don’t remind me of that, Chinese instructions, it was a nightmare.
I was more thinking of how I caught you in bed with her.
You didn’t catch us in the physical sense, we were testing the bed.
And you had to be naked to do that.
She’s Scandinavian, that’s what they do.
You were under the covers.
She was covering her modesty, the embarrassment you caused that day.
Yeah, I’m gutted.
You really have to do something about this paranoia.
Are you saying I’m nuts.
Well, the facts do speak for themselves.
You’re so right, it’s a strange thing paranoia, sometimes I think young James isn’t yours.
Just as well he’s the spitting image of me then.
Yes, that’s the strange thing, he’s the spitting image of your brother too.
What, what are you saying, have you been bedding my brother.
Not in the physical sense, I think
Well, in that case, young James is definitely mine then.
Don’t know, the condom your brother used, the instructions were in Chinese. 

Reviews

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Tit for Tat is always a good thing, I must say. What’s good for the gander is good for the goose! I advise some chopsticks for them next time (made in China of course). Who knows where that may lead haha! (The cat looks at her Chinese d***o with a sigh) 😹😹😹

[Paul Bell]

You be careful, especially if the batteries are Chinese. Could be the worse coming this year.

[Dhara_Ditzy Kat]

Boom boom pow pop bang...yeah baby...(rolling on floor) 😹😹😹

[Chris Shaw]

Very funny punch line Paul. You spin a good yarn.

Chris

[Paul Bell]

True story. lol

[Neville]

I wish I had only just spit my tea out...but you made me do that as well.. now I'm gonna have to go and change the skirt I been trying out for me missus.....Thoroughly enjoyed & more than just chuckleworthy... Neville

[Paul Bell]

Don't get that skirt stained. Men have been killed for that.

[Neville]

They have been killed for much less than that, they have around these parts anyway...

[Gypsy Warrior Queen]

There I go.. spitting out my tea again...you woulda thought by now I wouldn't drink whilst i'm reading one of your pieces! ;p

[Paul Bell]

Oops, spillage bill coming to me. lol