The Dilemma.

What’s a lovely girl like you doing in a dump like this.
I own it.
That course I took is working well.
Was that the diplomatic course.
It was, have you been on it.
Have I asked you any stupid questions.
Not yet, but give it time.
Ask me another question.
What’s your name.
Sonya.
You’re kidding, did your parents not like you.
Did you actually attend that course.
Well, i sort of started the online application, but this porn site popped up and i got distracted.
Did anything else pop up.
That’s quite witty, Sonya.
It wasn’t meant to be. I was meaning, did any religious sites pop up.
Well, they do say God works in mysterious ways. So I'm thinking he came through as busty Bertha from Berlin.
Are you a bit rusty chatting up women.
Well, i have just come out of a long term relationship.
Sorry to hear that, how long were you together.
A week.
Wish i hadn’t asked now. Was that a full week.
Well, a week is a week.
Not necessarily, it might have been Saturday, Sunday.
I suppose so.
So was it.
No, it was Wednesday, Saturday.
So technically it was four days.
If you want to be pedantic about it.
What about your relationship before that.
Eight days.
What’s your longest relationship.
Three weeks.
That must have seemed like a marriage to you.
Actually, my wife died tragically.
I’m really sorry, that was insensitive of me.
Only kidding Sonya, she ran off with the window cleaner. The windows have never recovered.
My God, you’re a train wreck.
You want to be on that train, don’t you Sonya.
I do, I actually want to go out with you. Why the hell do I want to go out with you.
Well Sonya, if you don’t go out with me. Then one fine day you’ll marry this boring guy, and I'll be at the back of your mind.
But in my mind, I’ve already dumped you.
Not necessarily Sonya, this could be a match made in heaven.
It won't be, I’ve already known you five minutes, and already you’re doing my head in.
Well that is a sort of a relationship, is it not.
I suppose so. I don’t even know your name.
It’s Paul.
Paul, did your parents not like you.
Do you see what you did there, Sonya.
OMG i’ve become you, how the hell did that happen.
I’m not sure Sonya, maybe we shouldn’t go out together.
No we must, it’s like i need to go out with you for my sanity’s sake.
Okay Sonya, pick you up at eight tomorrow night...

Reviews

[Beccy]

Brilliantly crafted, like an excerpt from a top flight sitcom.

Beccy.

[Paul Bell]

You know they lived happily ever after. lol

[Marina]

I think Sonya is a keeper. Think of all the witty banters us folk here will end up reading about lol

[Paul Bell]

Left me for a priest, after she confessed her sins. What is wrong with woman. Nice to see you stranger.

[Marina]

Women want someone who is a good listener. Possibly also one who posseses the magic touch of god. lol

[Paul Bell]

What did you say. I was watching the football. lol

[barleygirl]

As always, your avant garde conversations are wildly imaginative & also intriguing. There's just enuf reality in your ideas, but heavily peppered with wildish silliness, it's a unique brand of writing for you . . . very recognizable! *wink! wink!* Fondly, Margie

[Paul Bell]

I don't think it will last, Margie. lol

[Carol Cashes]

This reads like a real conversation, Mr. Bell. *eyebrows to hairline* Hmmm...?

Kinda long for a "pick up" line, but it worked...
This requires real commitment to the cause - get her name, digits, and address. *punch to your arm* Way to go, dude.

[Paul Bell]

Is she the one, Carol. lol

[Carol Cashes]

Well, she knows you're a liar who's quick to confess (dead wife), sexually healthy (Busty Bertha, romantic (future marriage to boring guy), and intriguing enough to overcome her (unsure) dislike that she consents (she thinks) to confirm her initial judgment (trainwreck). Well, all things considered, I'd say it looks mighty promising....

[emmajoy]

Brilliant!

'What about your relationship before that.
Eight days.
What’s your longest relationship.
Three weeks.
That must have seemed like a marriage to you.
Actually.. '

You had me grinning, line by line, wondering how it would end. Seems it never will. Theirs surely.. is a never-ending train-wreck of repartee, crossed limbs and smiles ripping love from the toes upwards. Haters make the best lovers, don't you know. May Sonya and Paul's union be blessed with words to die for. Srill gribbubg .. or in simple language, still grinning. See how words can be manipulated!

'Sonya, maybe we shouldn’t go out together.
No we must, it’s like i need to go out with you for my sanity’s sake.
Okay Sonya, pick you up at eight tomorrow night...'.. beautifully, salubriously, caustic.

[Paul Bell]

They'll live happily ever after. Or she'll kill him. lol

[emmajoy]

And you next poem will be,. The ghoul i left behind ?

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

So ,so clever Paul. This witty repartee, reminiscent of "Who's on first? What's on second" (Abbott and Costello), is a conundrum culminating in a convolutedly comical relationship...love the form, the flow, the content, the entire premise! Poor Sonya!

[Paul Bell]

Do you think this relationship will last. lol

[AYVID N]

I just love this poem and the satirical comment on relationships. Very relatable for me. I think they are on solid grounds.

[Paul Bell]

Yeah, i think they'll be okay. lol