I draw you in Five rings of smoke appear like magic Your face on every one Christ how romantic am I Maybe drink a JD in your honour It's amazing how little things bring you to me The phone comes alive halfway through your honour Your soft sexy voice sends a tingle down my spine You say it's over Well, that was out of the blue I draw you in The sign on the packet Smoking can damage your health and eventually kill you So profound I check the bottle of JD No warning on that You disappear into the clouds Every one a silver lining.
I was blown away by the calm and mysterious sentiment suddenly crushed by "Well, that was out of the blue", it made me literally laugh out loud. I love these kinds of poems, it's dark, but on a whole different level. It's psychotic, it depicts the moment when a heart truly breaks, where life is no longer a howling beast but an ugly snowglobe on the fireplace, that just sits there, mocking you.
Needless to say, great poem, one of my best reads today.
This is deep...I have always felt that addictions of any kind leave very little scope for true grieving for loss in love and relationships. Everything else becomes an excuse to turn to the fix. This poem clinched my belief.
You have a great way with words.
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
I think the drink consoles for a time. Though he is a masochist.
Interesting trot through emotions shifted by someone else's decision you are powerless to prevent, and thus one simply has to accept it. The JD (not my choice of tipple!) helps of course. Nice expressive free verse packed with quiet reflection.
Posted 8 Years Ago
8 Years Ago
I suppose any tipple would do it. I just like the initials of JD.
I do not smoke and I hate smokers... but this piece sounds romantic as the smoke used its magic to bring one closer to you (at least in imagination). But like any other story, imagination is just imagination, like a bubble that pops.
Great stuff!
I like poetry and stories that tell me something.
Sometimes the shortest poems hit the hardest.
If I post something serious, don't worry, a funny poem will follow. Don't hesitate to tell me if my po.. more..