Love Smoke

I draw you in
Five rings of smoke appear like magic 
Your face on every one 
Christ how romantic am I
Maybe drink a JD  in your honour
It's amazing how little things bring you to me
The phone comes alive halfway through your honour 
Your soft sexy voice sends a tingle down my spine 
You say it's over 
Well, that was out of the blue 
I draw you in 
The sign on the packet
Smoking can damage your health and eventually kill you 
So profound 
I check the bottle of JD
No warning on that
You disappear into the clouds
Every one a silver lining.

Reviews

[Duncan Brown]

Love love love love love........................

[Wolf's Dark Song]

Well done. Who hasn't tried to drive away the pain or chase it away, the relief of just no remembering any more.

[Deana Leigh]

I really enjoyed that it was a free verse poem. I think you put a lot of your heart and creativity into this poem as well. Overall, great job! I love that you ended it by saying "everyone a silver lining"

[Paul Bell]

Thanks Deana.

[Lydia Shutter]

Whiskey and cigarettes can not assuage the pain of lost love....especially when it is unexpected! Certainly romance should come with a warning label! I liked the honesty in this one. Lydi**

[Ardra]

liked the way you have penned it down..am not a fan of smoke..or drinks
the pain of loosing can leave you to a path of self destruction ...
so i guess poetry is better than the smokes and drinks.. no health damages!
wishing you lots of healing and quick recovery :)

[Paul Bell]

Thanks Ria

[Lorry]

It is amazing what little thoughts bring that person to mind, but I've never came across a health warning on a relationship either....not even the ones that should come with a biohazard warning. Great write, not a single word not carrying it's own weight as the last line fades and leaves us all thinking the same thoughts.

[Paul Bell]

Thanks Nemo

[Papaya]

This describes the defeated feeling of breaking up very well.
Cigarettes and alcohol, so bad for you.
Perhaps she was bad for you too, but your favourite vice no longer is there and that haze that follows until we lift ourselves up again.

[Paul Bell]

Thanks Papaya.

[Papaya]

You're welcome.

[D]

Umm... Dealing with breakups is a really messed up thing
..A well penned piece here. Your style needs getting used to, at parts, it made me a tiny bit uncertain if the line there actually belongs there...But reading further solves it, so overall 100/100 points here.

[Paul Bell]

Knew i would draw you in.

[T. Edana Talbott]

Such a raw poem. Really great stuff, I love the mystical vibe given from it.

[Paul Bell]

Thanks Edana.