Until Friday

It is only till Friday I say
Count the days
1-2-3-4-5-
His voice like an angel

Don't cry, I say
I will call every day
It hurts to speak
My trembling voice

Ring, ring, ring
Hello, yes, he is ready
Will be there shortly
His smug voice

Daddy's on his way
His eyes look into mine
I see the tears
His sea- blue eyes

His hand in mine
We walk outside
He watches each passing car
His sad boy eyes

There he is , I say
I feel his hand tighten
1-2-3-4-5-
His little boy voice

I love you, I say
I love you too
Five days?
His voice echoes

Five days, I say as they drive away

Author's Note

A blog or story will follow to explain

Reviews

[Poetic Justice]

seems captured from the eyes of the child..with an absent father and an aching heart..intrigued.

[Valentine]

Thixs sounds like a broken family and the father only getting to see his child on the week end..Sad but often true in the society we live in today..Deeply thoughts arise from this work..Vazlentine

[Marie Nichols]

Great write. Easy and emotional read.

[Sarah W. French]

I like this a lot. It has a perfect bitter sweet tone to it

[Cree Nations]

Good write.

[Devons]

There is a rather sad, touching, subtle unspoken backdrop underpinning this glimpse of a life. As much as what is said as is unsaid has equal sensitivity and impact here, in a poem told with a simplicity and gentleness that evokes strong feeling. A picture is built up in this way which reverberates in the tenderness of a situation.

So much can be said of broken relationships and families, but the sparing way this is executed has as much power and tragic charm as anything anyone could say. This is heartfelt, sincere; and is empowered by its simple unprejudiced truth.

[just is]

Oh wow I totally love this write,
You are very poetic with your words.
I like the vivid imagery i got, It was a sad imagery.
Very well written Chloe

[Writing4you12]

this was good i love it

[Jay Levon]

beautiful and moving, well done