Please Look Away

From an image born

Please, oh please
do not look upon me
looking this way
please, this is not the real me
look away ...

Regal, elegant oh so
beautiful was I
a lady proud strong and steadfast

My maiden voyage that cold
Spring day
twenty-two thousand strong
I alone held these people
within my bosom

Oh the majesty
the merriment
dining and dancing
walking upon my fine decks

Adorned in jewelery
crystal chandeliers
the sea beneath me
I sailed onward in grand style

Too fast, they were pushing me too fast
he said, full steam ahead
I knew...

Too few watching something
 is going to go wrong
I cannot forsake these souls
I am bound to protect them

Too fast , too few
and ice straight ahead
cold and cruel
this giant iceberg

Had they not pushed me
so hard, fast
had they watched with a keen eye
I could have held them all safely
until I docked

The ice cut into me deep, stabbing
the sea beneath was within me
I was sinking taking so many with me
I tried, oh how I tired to stay afloat

Please understand I was a beauty
steadfast and true
held by the sacred oath of ships

Had they not pushed me
so hard, fast
had they looked with a keener eye
you would not have to see me as this
I could have grown old with dignity

Those I held who went down with me
I still hold they are my passengers
I am as a mother holding onto them

I shed many tears
many a days
for I let them down
I let them down
now together we lie
beneath what was beneath me
oh how I cry

Author's Note

thought of the ship The Titanic as a lady... and perhaps had they not pushed her so fast and watched more closely- taking for granted because she was a mighty ship nothing could go wrong
maybe she would have made it to New York....

Reviews

[Devons]

A really touching personification of this most famous ship. Told like a story through her eyes, with compassion and a sense of the tragedy lurking beneath. Since ships are referred to as "she" this enactment of her as a woman and mother creates an automatic connection between man and machine. She was indeed beautiful, but I still think she is even now - beautiful in an awesome sense. Like a ghost of semi-preserved glory and life. The poem works very well and is a fine almost mystical summary re-telling. And I really like these lines:
"now together we lie
beneath what was beneath me"
...This last line has other connotations beyond the physical. How the mighty have fallen.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

You always go deep when you write... to me I think bout someone who tries to be a savior to everyone around them forgetting there own problems till they are overwhelmed and no one is there for them, in return.

[Iota]

First it is amazing what water does to steel, talk about creepy. If ships could talk and feel imagine the stories they could tell us on a long voyage across the seas. The ship didn't let them down, they let the ship down. What a lady she was. Nice write.

[Gomer LePoet]

I am sure she did shed many tears, and cried out loud, bemoaning her plight, carrying her children down. until a final gasp for air could be heard accross the decades.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

This is awesome hon! The last verse was exquisite! "for I let them down /I let them down /now together we lie /beneath what was beneath me/oh how I cry"...very moving...the ship mourning for her lost human cargo...great stuff!

[Ladysue]

Oh I like how you did this. It really is ingenious. It works perfectly. Awesomely done...

[ChristianM]

I think the concept was very ingenious but some of the lines seem too blunt.
For a lady of the sea i think the words would flow from the ocean.
Nonetheless, very creative and something different.

[The Analog Kid]

I agree with Devons. I also like how, after personifying the ship, it was the man's flaw by not listening to the machine. How ironic. Nice write:)

[Jenny Nelson]

A different way of coming at it. I like it. Well done.

[Wicahpi]

I agree with you!
I love that movie, though how sad.
She, I bet, was a beautiful sight to behold
all decked out in finery.
I bet her Captain was truly heartsick.