William Shatner... Get Outta My Head!

I hear William Shatner talking to me inside my head and he is telling me a story .. a silly one at that~

 

 

 

Star Date September 30, 3002

Captain's Log:

We encountered a huge asteroid today. It was so huge it was not measurable. Scotty said to go around it, but we couldn't! We pushed it as fast as we could! The asteroid stayed its course. Finally, we threw large amounts of salt on it and it melted.We discovered it was no asteroid at all , it was a mutant snail! We then were able to be on our way to rendevouz with the Vulcans. They have been up in arms as of late. The Federation has voted not to add cosmetic surgery to our HMO's and they were all clamering for new noses. We finally calmed them down with gift certificates to Mc Donald's. I sure miss my wife, that one Vulcan chick looked pretty hot... Wait! I have no wife! Do'h, another opportunity for romance foiled! (again)
 

We have a stop on Planet Earth scheduled for tomorrow. Perhaps there I could find romance. I fell in love there with a lovley blonde blue eyed beauty. At a convention one night I pulled her into a vacant bathroom and kissed her passionately.I was unpleasantly shocked when my love walked in on me and the blonde blue eyed hottie I was kissing. She would not beleive me. I tried to explain that I was confused , they all look alike, the women, all look the same, as they have added Cosmetic Surgery to their HMO's. It is hard to tell one from the other, she did not beleive me, she left me. I am now alone in outer space. I wonder if the Venetians have added cosmetic surgery to their HMO's? Perhaps, if I am lucky, and I am lucky, I shall find my true love there.... They all look alike on earth now

Author's Note

silly .. oh, he said, 'Don't use pink text again.. final warning'...
oh and this is a restoration ...

Reviews

[Blackbirdsong]

LMAO Chloe!!!! Did you fall asleep with the TV on or something? This was interesting to say the least and yes you have a typo with "believe," but so what. Pink type at this hour of the morning. Lord only knows what I'll be dreaming tonight after this. But if William Shatner is in my dreams, its all your fault.

LOL

An interesting trip through your imagination my dear. :)

[Sean M. Addams]

very cute.. I enjoyed reading this one alot..

[James Watts]

Lol. Star Trek humor. Gotta love it.

[Rie Sheridan Rose]

It sounds like something he'd say, all right. :) Very clever, Chloe. Thanks for sharing it with us. :)

[Crimson Shadow]

You are wack, Chloe - laughing...cosmetic surgery, and MacDonald's, HMO's and Vulcans - only a wild imagination could wrap this one up - you are too funny!

[Noel]

LOL - this is comical, Chloe, and I too, can hear Shatner's voice! My husband LOVES Shatner... I just HAD to read it.

[Jonathan Bryant Dean]

Of all of the exotic planets, he finds potential romance on Earth! lol Then after failing here he goes to Venus, because we all know that while men are from Mars, women are from Venus!!

I also like the statement that "They all look alike." Very funny.

The text needs to be seperated into true paragraphs, and I would encourage the use of double-spacing to make the text easier to read.

Here are some of the Typos:
lovley -- lovely
beleive -- believe (twice)
outter -- outer


JBD

[Randall Richard]

this is a bit "warped". it's odd. clever concept.

[Greg the Bard]

Best humor I've seen sence we change the site. LOL I love this and sent it along to some friends of mine.(Trekeeeees) Wonderful write

[Gandré]

I never watched any sci fi except S. Kubrick's Odyssey 2000 but this was convincing. Sweet, even in pink. Why not. This was lovely because not too long sci fi text. I just understand this as a sweet fantasy! well done! it is even torrent of information. I wouldn t read that if not you, dear Chloe. I cannot read sci fi and vampires and blood. Then I am afraid. lol.

[Chantal-lise Mirman]

Oh, Chloe! I love William Shatner, and Star Trek! This piece is hilarious, with it's garish neon pink font! I was imagining it read in Shatner's trademark staccato speech... Great satire, with an undercurrent plea for individuality. Hopefully, the cooky cutter mentality has not spread to the Venusians, and Bill will find true love there!

There are some typos that need spell-checking, but I can never get Notes to work right.