Jane

I am featuring this because of the severe winter weather happening in most of the USA I thought about this last night when the temperature dropped to 12 degrees~ 'She forgot who she was"..

 

 

 

She walks the streets
no shoes adorn her feet
bare
bruised
rough, calloused

She finds solace in an
old suitcase
it holds all her belongings
she treasures them

A book of poetry
a purple silk scarf
a comb with most of it's teeth missing
like it forgot to visit the dentist
and
a picture
little girl
blonde
blue eyes with
a smile that lights the darkest rooms

She knows of dark rooms
she lives in darkness
she had a flat but her job
well, her job let her go
so the man said, "Get Out"
she tried to get another job
"we're not hiring", they always said

After a time , a long time
she forgot her name
now,
well, now
she roams the dirty boulevard
and wonders who she is
and how she got here
she wonders who the little girl is
who's smile lights the darkness in which she lives

People sneer at her
laugh, point , stare
a woman with faded blue eyes
dirty blond hair
in Salvation Army rags
they laugh
they make her feel
'uncomfortable'
they call her
the bag lady
among other names

Sometimes she cries
though she is used to it
her stomach gnaws with hunger pains
as she searches the trash and dumpsters
for a crumb
just a crumb
one crumb

The man at the bakery watches her
his heart is not hard
he calls her
she doesn't hear him
because
she doesn't want to

She knows what he wants
laughing
sneering
pointing
she walks past

Some nights she sees Angels
they call her name
"Jane"
"Jane"
"Hello Jane,
do you know
someday you will inherit
this Earth"?

Someday isn't soon enough for
sweet Jane
someday needs to be today

"Jane, don't cry",
they say
"someday"
"someday"
"someday"

"Please", she whispers
"help me find my way home"
"please", she cries
"let me be visible again"

She feels so alone
she is alone
but when she looks at the faded photograph
her heart feels lighter
the world
brighter

She coughs a lot
her house leaks
her nose runs
her stomach aches with hunger pangs

The Angels visit her every day now
"Jane, someday is now"
"Are you going to show me the way home"?

"Follow the light Jane"
She feels warm for the first time
in so long
the feeling is surreal
the light radiates throughout her
filling her,satiating the hunger
cold, loneliness

In the distance
beneath a tree of
fragrant blossoms
by a stream as clear as crystaline crystal
sets the little girl
"Mommy", she cries
"You finally came home"




 

Author's Note

I am glad I wrote this one on wordpad.. people need to be aware of this ... and not all homeless are drug addicts or alcoholics.. most are people like you and me .. it is said most Americans are one paycheck away from being homeless.. it could happen to any of us!

Reviews

[Lionel Braud]

this poem has a lot going, it is a narrative poem full of heeartache and hope, and has a harsh sense of realism, contemporary urban realism, lot of rhymes and off rhymes, slant rhymes, good use of dialogue, not many use dialogue, robert frost did, this incorporates lots of poetic styles.

[Benarsi]

This is so beautiful Chloe--so sad, heart-breaking. I like the ending paragraph--you show us reality and prove that not everything is what it seems. I lived in India some of my childhood and the horrors I witnessed come back to me after reading this--it's a tough, painful but powerful message. Thank you for sharing, Chloe.

B.

[Nathan Strange]

Hey this was really well written, and I mean that. This journey of a little girl wandering the street, scavaging through dustbins, carrying a broken comb. It was sad but so vivid and the little details you added like the purple scarf was icing on the cake. Loved it, however the ending made it seem like one of those donation ads lol. I'd take out the statistics. This story is stylish and classy too good for marketin a charity campaign, even though it would be nice too.
Good write Chloe...

[1809 Black Plague Decem..]

this piece made me cry, thank you. mimi

[[untitled]]

She finds

[V]

This week I have been spotting typing errors, for some strange reason... So, to start with... Chloe, I found a few, just incase you miss them.

'a comb with most of it's teeth missing' [its], 'she roams the dirty bloulevarde' [boulevarde], 'who's smile lights the darkness in which she lives ' [whose], '"let me visible again"' [let me be? visible again], 'filling her,satiating the hunger ' [space missing at comma], 'cold, lonliness' [loneliness], 'I am so thankful I have a roof over my head and my childs. so very thankful.' [child's]

Another real poem, Chloe. This one is as good as, if not better than, the last one you wrote about a homeless person. I admire your insight into the lives of people who are less fortunate and have to live a life that is not all that it should be. You captured the sadness of this woman beautifully, and how she slowly faded away, until one day she simply passed away. Very sad, but real, and truthful, and that is what I like about your writing... Reading this was effortless, apart from the emotions that came to the surface.
Thank you for sharing.
V.

[James K. Blaylock]

So very sad and heartbreaking to read. Although, this type of thing happens daily somewhere out in the world. Way too often people fall through the cracks of life. Some make it with help from others, while many are never heard from again. Thanks so very much for sharing this write with me.

[Chantal-lise Mirman]

This is a tough subject, much closer to our own daily existence than most of us realize. Most of us are only a few paychecks from being homeless ourselves. While there are some who have taken to the streets because of the shuttung down of Mental Institutions, most of the homeless are actually part of the working poor. You are to be commended for shining a light on this problem.

As to the poem itself, I like the anonymity of the title, "JANE" as in Jane Doe. The stanzas each have their own little limited focus, and the reader jumps from one to the other, sharing Jane's bewilderment at her predicament. You paint a clear picture of someone becoming less and less attached to the real world, finally becoming so marginalized that she slips away entirely.

We empathize with "Jane" and her disconnect with the world, then sympathize when we learn than her downward spiral started with the death of her own daughter.

The flow is easy, as is the conversation. There are a few small spelling errors, but they do not detract from the gist of your message....

Congratulations

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Great write Chloe. Typo..."Boulevard" I really enjoyed this sad but all too often true story.

[Debra Stevens Edwards (..]

Chloe does it surprise you that I call you my inspiration, you search out the facts that others try to
overlook and serve them up with a powerful conviction. Often making us acknowledge our part in letting it continue. This is what inspires me Your passion for people as a whole. Your passion for
justice and doing whats right. Another amazing Write by my hero, my inspiration. BRAVO.
Debby

[Jaime Luthe]

Chloe..u are truly an amazing writer!! u always leave me thinking..what happened next? and that is a true gift! Keep it up doll!
PEACE n INK