because i am a loan

i was caught ironically in the middle of a rain

each drop a gift someone said a moment

i don't know why my car broke down

i let it 

the bridge to the other side

weighed heavy on my conscience

beyond where??

should i have gone or was i just waiting

for the right person

not making my decisions

playing in the garden of sudden sweet and sultry 

scratching my neck

for something bit me when we made love

ignoring, as i leaned

and now i don't care if that car got wet

i'm not a windshield wiper

and i don't remember our tongues moving in and out of our mouths

cleaning each other for hours

you climbed on top of me and I felt necessary

in reflection, i looked different

like my coming back was a good decision

i can hold a lot of weight

in my heart

i can see through

although i'm blind

you can take away my privileges

i have something important within your grasp

to sleep around you

i'm not ironic

i am human.