Same Train Home

They were booked on the same train home...

His soft lips engulfed me and I fell into darkness.

 

***

 

A small smile played on the edges of my mouth as I squeezed the man in whose arms I lay, happy for the first time in an entire year. He had come home.  I knew of so many girls, so many friends and family members that had lost fiancé’s in France but mine had returned to me safe and sound. Part of me didn’t even want to open my eye’s because I was scared that the dream would be shattered and he would be gone and once again I would be left alone in an empty bed.

 

Everything was perfect.

 

Blinking the sleep from my eyes I opened them to find a single ray of morning sunlight peeking through the curtains and fell onto the sheets that were thrown over John and I. Smiling still, I rolled over and lay my head on his chest, kissing it lightly.

“Morning,” I whispered into his skin, still unable to get over the idea that he was here, he was safe. I felt his chest rise and fall as he let out a contented sigh and kissed the top of my head gently.

“Good morning.”

 

I froze.

 

The deep grumbles of the morning greeting sounded off, as if it were another voice…another person. And yet I knew that voice. It was so familiar to me that I didn’t want to look up and see the dark brown eyes of the man that wasn’t my fiancé. He must have sensed my reaction because he let out a second, more exasperated sigh. Yet still I wouldn’t look up, I just stared at a small scar on his chest, a scar that John had never had…

Panic rose in my throat and my heart quickened as with every second I came closer to the realisation that this man wasn’t john, this man was his best friend and I had… I didn’t even want to think about it. The pain was unbearable, incomprehensible. Closing my eyes quickly I covered myself with a sheet and rolled over and out of the bed. James groaned quietly behind me as I rushed out of the room and locked myself into the bathroom.

 

I broke down.

 

Uncontrollable sobs escaped my lips as I tried to keep back the tears that were hysterically streaming down my cheeks. This couldn’t be happening, it just wasn’t possible. I knew I should keep quiet to save James the humiliation of the situation but I couldn’t. I was trying to suppress it but I was too weak for it.

 

My heart ached.

 

As I sat on the floor, I tried in vain to jog my memory. I remembered meeting someone off the train, crying in his arms, out of happiness or sadness I couldn’t recall. I vaguely recollected a bar in some downtrodden area of town, and of drinking more than I should, quicker than I should…then everything was blank.

 

And then it hit me.

 

What would John say if he found out? What would he do to James? I remembered talk after talk where my fiancé would tell me that if any guy even attempted anything with me he would be flat on his back within seconds. He might have been laughing while he said it as he tickled my sides playfully but I saw the seriousness in his eyes. His words were the truth and the truth was that I might have broken up a friendship he had held since he was a boy all over one drunken night. I had ruined the best thing that I had ever had over one stupid drunken kiss.

At that moment in time I didn’t care about the war, I didn’t care that Churchill was set to make an announcement today and I had to be there to document it. I didn’t care about anything apart from the fact that I had just cheated on the one man I had ever loved with the one man I had never taken a second glance at.

Yes James was attractive, yes he was sweet and yes I had caught him looking at me a fair few times when I had been with John. I had even seen a hint of hurt in his eyes when had announced our engagement. I remembered the moment I kissed john goodbye at the train station. I had tears in my eyes as I hugged him tightly and begged him to return to me safely. James had come up to me, hugged me and promised me that he would bring John back even if it killed him, anything to know that I would smile again. I guess I should have seen this coming.

 

I was so confused.

 

Why had I slept with James? Why had I let my guard down? I didn’t understand why I had been with James this morning and not with John, they should have caught the last train back together, they should have been home at the same time…

 

My heart shattered.

 

No, this couldn’t have happened, this couldn’t be happening to me. Memories started flitting back into my mind. James stepping off the train, James pulling me into a hug as I cried into his shoulder. James handing me one last letter… no, not John no.

The hysterics where slowly starting to creep back up as I struggled to stand. I had to go ask James, to ask him if this was true. Bursting through the bathroom door I came out into an empty room with an empty bed. James was gone.

Carefully making my way across the floor to my bed my eyes caught sight of something that had not been there before. A small piece of paper folded up and left on my pillow.

 

Daisy,

            I’m sorry, he’s gone, I tried to save him but I wasn’t quick enough, he died in my arms. I’ve failed you and I am sorry for it, I will never forgive myself. He truly did love you, almost as much as I do.

                        James

 

My entire world collapsed in on itself and I was dragged into hell.

Reviews

[Natasha]

I can not think of anything constructive to improve this story. I like it very much, just the way it is!

[Romeana]

I can honestly say that this is the best thing I've read so far. (But don't think too much of that, as I have only read three or four other works.) Not only is it well written, but you also used your knowledge of an actual war for your setting, and I appreciate that. You portrayed Daisy's pain very well. I liked this. Thank you for a nice read.