Little Boy Blue

Avatar: Little Boy Blue by Brenden Abbott

Sometimes

I feel like I am still

a little boy.

A child with few

grown up insights

into how the world works.

 

I sit without reason

and let the day

wash over me.

I feel relieved

for the passing

of the empty hours,

here in the quiet,

in the tranquillity

of my blanked out

mind.

 

I can feel the peace,

a guilty peace

that is like some

deep ache,

a hunger in my belly.

 

Then I am the schoolboy

who hasn't completed

his homework,

or who took a chocolate bar

from the fridge

without parental permission.

 

The guilt drips slowly

like an infusion

into my veins.

and sits there in pools

making my eyes weary,

dragging me further

into this tunnel

of torpid torpor.

 

Nothing makes

any sense here

in this pretty dungeon.

 

And here the hours

become days,

the days become weeks,

the weeks turn

into months which

morph into

many, many wasted

human years.

 

13/06/19

Author's Note

Reviews

[Aurora]

What a lovely poem, John! I thought this would be a spin-off of Nina Simone's Little Girl Blue, but this has pleasantly surprised me. I love the artwork too.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

I am glad you liked it Aurora, many thanks.

[lightsong]

my dear friend, Your poem touched me with the more than one level it revealed through its lines, the human's emotions and thoughts, yearning and fears, I feel Your yearning to be a little boy again, living in his small world, carefree and energetic, where the troubles of the world didn't reach into his pure mind and heart, still as I walked with You the road to see then how while You were growing up, somehow it seemed that You are stuck, routine can kill one's spirit and potentials and this what I felt here in Your last verse.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

A perceptive analysis dear Light. I thank you for such careful consideration.

[lightsong]

You are welcome my friend :)

[Edie Blue Starfish]

I'm thankful sometimes for the quiet empty hours and other times I find them maddening as they fill my head with unwanted memories and feelings.
I can relate to this poem in my own way. Really like this one.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Yes me too but that guilt at not having done more still raises its ugly head. Manmy thanks Edie.

[Chris Shaw]

Having too much time to dwell on our inner thoughts has never been helpful in my opinion. The more you look, the more you find. That's torture in my book. I used to go there and nit pick at all my failings, but not any more. Better to concentrate on the here and now. Well written free verse that others will relate to. I did.

Chris

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Indeed so Chris. I guess the news that we can't go on holiday brought this one out lol. Now waiting to see if discharge is today or not. Many thanks.

[Chris Shaw]

Sorry to hear that :(

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you!