I love your style...the short clips of thought that move the reader forward...building a mental and emotional response as we connect and empathize with your words. The bane of love--and betrayal--is that the heart cannot stop wanting or needing...despite how much we've been pecked apart, eviscerated...still, we seep that oily essence of devotion, don't we? Odd, how it looks so much like blood. :) Very nicely done, John.
Very good choice of words in this one and how you put it all together. I think a relatable write for many. How often have I felt similar, especially like your lines 4-8, and am still feeling at times, being a scattered being because of a past that left a lot of marks and scars and still we find ourselves on an ongoing search for the very thing that just ripped us apart. And we always welcome it again. And hope to find someone who takes us with all our broken parts, someone who cares for the wounds in a further sense and does not add to them although being close will always make us very vulnerable and might inevitably makes us hurt one way or another.
I tend to say my heart is a fool but your title expresses it very well too.
I think your poem ends in disillusion for me.
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
It is sadly a feeling many people experience in today's high octane, full-on, gimme, gimme, gimme no.. read moreIt is sadly a feeling many people experience in today's high octane, full-on, gimme, gimme, gimme now society. I am never disillusioned for long and thus the holding of optimism is a driver of the spirit to remain hopeful despite failures. Many thanks.
7 Years Ago
Well said. I agree. I use to stick to optimism too though, mostly. You're welcome.
Again you have written an amazing piece. You use words which I would choose to describe my own insanity in trusting and loving only to end up "tattered" as well. I love it!
I am sorry you relate to this but like many of us who write both for fun and to express, sharing oft.. read moreI am sorry you relate to this but like many of us who write both for fun and to express, sharing often helps us to keep our own issues in perspective. I know I have so enjoyed the works and words of many good friends on WC. Many thanks for taking the trouble to read.
7 Years Ago
NB: There is a troll on WC who has copied my page and is being abusive to others, especially women, .. read moreNB: There is a troll on WC who has copied my page and is being abusive to others, especially women, so watch out. You can tell who is who if you check the url. Mine is passion8, his is passionhate. He also has multiple personalities. We once counter over 40!
Depleted to the bare bones, there is nothing left to give. One appreciates love from a distance but finds oneself without the strength to actually engage.
Love the line with the scratching hens. Made me laugh so much!
"my spirit ravaged
by all the pecking of scratching hens"
Thanks dear John.
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
Ah those hens they never stop incessantly pecking and scratching! Glad I made you laugh. Thank you D.. read moreAh those hens they never stop incessantly pecking and scratching! Glad I made you laugh. Thank you Divya.
Well, have a long and complicated story and started it as an autobiography on Bebo but got writer's block/memory fogging. People liked it though and kept asking for the next chapter! fools.. more..