The Battle

The Battle

One day I will win

the battle for my peace.

The devil will lay bloodied

and broken,

his skull caved in like egg shell,

his crown crushed as tin

beneath my heavy foot.

Until then, I

must gather my army of angels

and wage a tactical war.

A skirmish here,

a dark night raid.

A frontal assault upon

his mighty fortress,

slitting the throats

of his disciples as I go.

My dirk tightly grasped

like life itself

in my free

and human hand

to protect my soul.

 

03/09/12

Reviews

[Alexandria Reece]

You write with such authority, this is a wonderful expression of your thoughts on the war you mean to wage with evil. This is so human, you really captured something that is so broadly relatable for mankind and captured it with dark, beautiful, triumphant imagery.

'his skull caved in like egg shell,
his crown crushed as tin'

Embellishments like these I would encourage you to continue with! You really got me to feel and see and taste what your mind was trying to relate to the reader. This is aggressive, unique, and wondrous! The imagery at the end sort of reminded me of a scene from 'The Silmarillion'... if you have read it I'll tell you which I thought of, if not there's no reason to begin story time with Alexandria on your review section! :P

All in all, wonderful work John.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Thank you Alexandria. I will check it out.

[Alexandria Reece]

You're welcome :)

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

One can almost see your strength pulsating from these lines John. I too believe you will emerge victorious.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

It has been a long and bloody battle but I have 'The Bruce' (King of Scotland in late 1200s to early 1300s) in me!!

[John Phoenix Hutchinson..]

Bravo. Not normally a fan of your pieces but this one is brilliant and worthy of a 100 rating indeed. Keep grasping that 'dirk' tightly!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Hi John. Naw we can't like every style so que sera sara. Anyway I am glad you liked this. Many thanks.

[That_Girl]

Comes across, to me at least, as a personal war with one's self. I really enjoyed this. Nice!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Yes I think that is it. Many of us face this battle; many thanks.

[That_Girl]

Anytime. :)