PLEASE UNDERSTAND THIS

 

im utterly and completely pathetic,
i wanted it so bad
just someone to be with, someone to make me feel emotionally good
like prince charming,
i wanted it so bad,
that i compromised my integrity, my dignity
for what
he was a wolf in sheep’s clothing
a dog in a prince's clothing
god how i hate him so bad, i hate him like i've never hated anything
i can't believe i fell for his s**t
i was so blind by want,
i never saw him for what he was

 

NEVER, will i let that happen again
NEVER, will i fall for it,
fariy tales are all lies, there is no prince to come and take you away and love you
he DOES NOT EXIST, he IS NOT REAL, its all a FAKE, a LIE

after i got home,
i could smell him on me
in my hair,
on my clothes
god only knows how hard i scrubbed my skin
god only knows how long i stayed in that tub,
so i could wash the smell of him away
i could smell him still after, and it tore me to pieces
i can't believe i believed it
what guy only wants one girl


i didn't let him love me like he wanted to
so he loved someone else
not caring how that would hurt me
filling up his own needs
so selfish
his name,
his face,
i don't want to see it
i don't want to hear it
i want him gone from my mind

he wanted a w***e,
he wanted a s**t
someone to spend their legs on command
someone with no morals
with not a care in the world

but,
i AM NOT a w***e,
i AM NOT a s**t
nor do i spead my legs for no guy
i may not not care anymore
i may have lost my morals,
but they did not go far

he's brought out the animal in me,
the devil in me
the beast in me,
the hate in me

he has driven out the love in me
the trust in me

he must not have known what kind of person i am
how easy i love
how easy i want
how easy i need

had he known,
had he really known me,

maybe,
just maybe
he wouldn't have done it
hadn't taken her in front of me
her, 
of all the people her

why
cause he doesn't care,
she didn't care
it was all a game to them
no love
no passion,
nothing,
nothing at all,
not ONE SINGLE OUNCE
of feeling between them
just something they did,

like animals

not caring how it would hurt me
not knowing how it would hurt me

now they do do know,
now they do,
now they get it
they get the mistake they made

but too little 
too late

because what they did is permanent
un erasable
in my mind
in my heart

i laugh
because they really don't know,
they don't understand,
don't get
what kind of person im am

i NEVER forgive,
i NEVER forget

in my heart,
the scene replays its self
over
and 
over
again

so learn this lesson 
this is a truth
a fact,
that must be done
that must be said

i won't lie to myself any longer
any more
love does not exist,
man are dogs
and someone,
everyone,
sooner or later
will hurt you
will put their needs
their want,
their lust,
before your feelings,

before you

do not trust,
do not love,
it will only led to hate
and the destruction of your heart

do not blind yourself to the dangers that threaten your heart
do not blind yourself to the truth of reality,

that men are dogs
dogs that can tear a friendship apart
this is a warning,
a caution of the heart

because inside me,
is a sign that reads beware,
and this sign about my heart is not for my protection
but for those who would try to break in
they have no idea what lies behind this wall
what lies awake
ready,
perpared,
for any attack
of any kind,

i am ready
ready for him,
the next guy to try to tear my heart apart
he better beware,

because I WILL TEAR HIM APART,

and leave him with absolutely nothing,
i have to, because if i don't do on to others,
they will do on to me,
and i am no doormat
no little girl waiting for a prince,
i am lying in wait for the filthy dog that lies within all men

I am ready this time

Their deceit will NOT go un seen

EVER

again

Author's Note

ingore grammer please and try not be to be tooo harsh, i've never really done this

Reviews

[Seeker]

The tone of this poem totally fits my mood right now. As I read further I was near tears. I thought, "So I'm not alone". I agree with one of the other reviewers. This poem is absolutely intense.
I have to say, though, that although men are cruel, they are not all horrible, and it doesn;t mean that you have to slam your next chance at love. Experiences such as this really mess people up because they have the mentality that they will never allow themselves be hurt again, thereby pushing away those who genuinely mean well. If this poem is really personal to you, just be careful. (No prob if you discard my advice). It is better to have an open heart, no matter how battered it gets.
This is a great poem. Keep writing!

[rash]

don't follow this path. all men are dogs and women are b*****s. we all try our best. let go of ideals. see the reality for what it is and let go of yesterday to live tomorrow with hope in the rebellion of your independence. There is order to love. n0 order to lust. Loyalty to love and lust, but no order. Have faith.

[Glenna.]

I use this word far too much, but I really have to say that that poem was INTENSE. You had great tone and conveyed it well. Outstanding in my opinion. :)

I truly liked:

"he's brought out the animal in me,
the devil in me
the beast in me,
the hate in me"

yesyes. It was intense. :D