Blame

You go sleep with the fishes

There's no room for you here

Wrap your teeth around the pavement

Because your body's a message

Send my regards to hell

Fall upon your knees sing

This is my body and soul here

Fall

and beg

and plead

sing

You've got the power and control

Don't pin it all on me

"But you grabbed his arm and touched his tattoo."

"My mom is always joking like that."

"She teased you and Brian and you didn't mind."

I sat in the car discussing my sexual harassment with my friend.

I told her what her mother did.

How she called us lovebirds.

How she planted the idea of marrying me in his head.

A 24 year old girl. A 47 year old man.

I couldn't believe my ears as she stood up for her mother.

And how she didn't believe what her mother did was wrong.

 Deep down I am enraged.

And I know it wasn't my fault.

I asked if the man had been spoken to.

And he said I gave him mixed signals.

It is never okay to touch someone the way he touched me.

Never.

But they believe him.

And my dignity was thrown out the window.

This is my body.

This is my soul here.

For a split moment I was shocked at the wishes I wished.

But when you're blamed and victimized.

What would you think?

What would you do?

In that moment your best friend wouldn't stand up for you.

And blamed you.

 

Author's Note