Unsteady

Hold on to me

Because

I'm a little

u n s t e a d y 

I am under the night sky

Look at the moon

Watch the stars

Unsteady

They aren't as bright

They aren't what they used to be

The world keeps spinning around

Where is he?

Every time I take a leap of faith

I come crashing down

I get cut

I get scraped

Used and spit out

Played with in hate

I am done

My wild heart has cracked

My bones are broken

Where are you?

Gentle man

Gentleman

Man

Who will write with me?

Catch my tears

Calm my fears

Show me red

Are we in the clear?

Where are you?!

I am sick and tired

Tired of waiting

The lonely days 

They're falling away

I am breaking

I want arms

His eyes in the morning

No lies

I went to England

Red busses

Castles and tea

Rain and heat

but where was he?

In Trafalgar square

With the BBC

Wind in my hair

A pair of eyes were all over me

But I lost them in the buzzing crowd

I searched in Paris

and I got so close

Eiffel Tower

Bikes and chimes

Bread cheese and wine

The love lock bridge

I stood over the water

Hope in my heart

I made a wish

I closed my eyes

Tossed in the key

but my Frenchman Andre

He never answered me

I fell for Ireland

and on Main Street I was held

In a dead man's arms

I healed his hurt

Nourished his mind

I held his hand

He never let go

I whispered a secret in his bed  

We meshed and molded 

Found common ground

But dust on me was coated

Secrets unfolded

I took bullets

and watched us bleed

Their guns loaded

I fell to the ground

This wasn't what wanted

Or what I needed

I really began to wonder

Where IS he?

I am home in enormous America

Alone again

I just wanted to be loved

I gave up trying

Because I am dying

Slowly every day

Where is he?

I buried all my failure under a tree

Someone will eventually love me

but for now

I am unsteady

and forever I always will be

 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Lorry]

Such beauty and ache pours from the page and leaves the reader with similar moments they have played over and over in their minds, for the most part to no avail. I love the phrase I m unsteady, such a simple and easy to understand, yet impossible to define statement of self, that is only accessible through genuine, heartfelt honesty. Superbly written. Bravo.

[PoeticSorcery]

i know where you're coming from, though from the other side of things. I keep hoping to find a nice cute girl who'll accept me for who I am as I do for her, without simply expecting the impossible from me, like the ability to read her mind or be rich. love should come first, shouldn't it?

[-]

I simply love this poem. It sounds like you are on a quest in search for unfortunately an endangered species which is the Gentleman. I was engaged the whole time. I hope you find your Mr. Darcy. N.