Leaving Home

I'm a drop in the ocean

I live my life on a wave of emotion

and now it's time to find someone to call my  own

I don't want a world at war so let me go

Its just a thought that I'd throw on the ocean

Here we are!

I'm about to leave the colorful green cornfields and red farms.

The winding country roads, my chopped down forest, the children and the schools, the churches, the bars, the restaurants, the shops and the university. 

The happy storybook like town I live in.

The friendly smiling faces.

My friends.

My family.

I am about to fly to Ireland.

As the year went on, and as I patiently awaited for this trip, I could taste the freedom in my mouth.

The taste budding in my eyes, in my head, and on my tongue was glorious.

One by one, the months slowly but surely melted away.

And now that the day is nearly here, the view of freedom I've had tastes melancholy.

A twang of sadness, fear, anxiety, and love has slapped me across the face.

It has sunk into my stomach.

Sometimes in order to follow your heart, you must lose your mind.

The scariest part of all this is, I am going to find out if  truth is real.

I am going to meet a friend for the first time.

This is life, and life is a roller coaster ride.

Some people say I am leaving too soon...but what I like to say is..

Do you really know?

Do you know when my last day will be?

I'm leaving at the time I am supposed to leave.

From the beginning I knew this could be very dangerous, but I wanted to keep going...just to see how a story unfolded.

To see the magic of human interaction come alive and soar up into the sky, with a triumphant noise.

The only way to hear the noise is to leave home.

Truthfully?

I've made a lot of mistakes.

I'll do just about anything, even if it takes putting war paint on my face.  

I've become blind, I've hurt others when I didn't mean to, and I've disappointed my family.

and that kills me.

Usually when you know what you want,  it stems from a  strong drive sizzling like a fire in your bones. 

My drive is like a dragon, and people often tell me that is what kept me alive when I was born.

I was hoping that leaving home would be positive.

People would be proud of me.

But I often feel like a mad girl.

The daughter of Icarus in me has taken flight again.

I can feel everyone's fear.

I can feel my parents fear.

I love them so, and I want to thank them.

They are quite brave.

Through fear is love.

And the love my family has for me is heartbreaking.

I often feel I don't deserve it.

I don't really deserve all the things I've been spoiled with.

Their love is unconditional, and I am so lucky.

Thank you mom and dad for absolutely everything. 

Please know that, I firmly believe this is all happening for a reason.

A good reason.

I know you're scared, and so am I!

But in the end, I'd rather have words to write on blank pages.

Even if they are devastating.

I don't know what is going to happen, but I know it will be a lesson.

Perhaps leaving home will make us stronger.

This is life.

We only have one. 

And we're all getting older each day.

Leaving home, will give me time to find someone I can call my own.

and no; the person isn't a man, or a new friend.

The person is me.

When I leave home, I will be on a journey, to find more of myself.

We are always growing.

Always learning.

Always breathing.   Always going.

I'll see you very soon.

I'll call every day.

I love you to the moon and back.

-Kathryn

 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I understand this poem. I deployed often in the Army. I learn later the sadness I create. I like the thoughts and the concern in the story. Thank you my friend for sharing your amazing story and I hope you had a good time.
Coyote

[Fahmida Mehreen]

Some decisions seem difficult only till the point you actually decide on it. Once you have set your mind upon it, your heart starts to feel lighter at the thought of the longing escape. And, we all deserve to give ourselves the chance to feel life on its own. When the whole world seems messed, mind boggled, heart crunched; a little escape is the lifesaver. If you want move on, you have to spare yourself.

A lovely piece. There was much to which I could relate. Many lines which I have said, ought to have said, heard, ought to have heard. So, I could feel the hidden sentiments.

Thanks for sharing such a wonderful piece.

[An Ominous Writer]

Enjoyed this poem! Quite pulchritudinous !

[samparks,sam]

Nice you have freedom for fly. This is nice. Ireland beside India.

[wordman]

and i hope it`s a fairytale come true !