Pretty Face

I see my pretty face in his old eyes

I listen to our blood run side by side

I throw my hands to you I run away

It's so cold so dangerous that I cant stay

They want to take me but I will hide from them

Tonight I take your life and throw it far away

I use my pretty face to find my way to him

 

At this moment they're sharpening their knives.

Circling like vultures.

Loading their guns.

Setting the cages.

When they found out I turned a man down they heavily disapproved.

And the scolding began.

My choices once again  have been frowned upon.

I must be a terrible person to do such a thing.

Will I ever win?

I  simply do not want to love another. Not now.

I do not want his time.

I do not want his offers.

And I certainly do not want his arms or his lips.

It's not my fault I can't feel.

For you cannot choose love!

Love chooses you.

If we were able to choose, I would not have chosen distance.

No one would want the naysayers.

The doubters. The fearful. The faithless.

No one would choose to go through what I've been through.

Yet it has taught me so much.

It has given me strength. Courage. Faith. Hope.

It has given me a monstrous amount of patience I never knew I had.

All I am doing is waiting on something fun.

Waiting on a man who is waiting on me.  

I am not putting all my eggs in one basket.

I am merely granting our wishes.

Hopeful I will be.

and hopeful I stay.

I may not get to be with him for long..

But this is a story unlike others.

A story that I've decided will never be told out loud. 

After what I've heard.

What I've seen.

It will be a story that will reside in only two hearts.

If we speak it out loud, the magic might die.

The vultures will pick us apart.

Sometimes the best things in life are memories and moments of secrecy you keep to yourself.

Still the other men try.

And they never give up. Pestering me and messaging me.

There was a man who I almost went out to get coffee with.

I noticed his last name had changed, and then I realized something...

I googled him with the last name I remember him having..

And then I found out he was a rapist .

A person who was charged for second degree sexual assault.

He drugged girls. He followed them home.

What would he have done with me?

I certainly have an angel watching over me.

Thank goodness I put two and two together.

People keep telling me to keep my options open and I gladly do...

but I have not heard from or seen a true gentleman yet.

Maybe there is a reason why.

Perhaps I was right after all.

I'm on the right path and I'm going to where I need to be.

No one knows why...but we'll find out.

From now on, all I want is to be kept from harm.

 

 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Brad P]

Ignore the ignorant moron. Thanks again for sharing

[M P Ramesh]

Kathryn,

It is a fact that writers should horn alarms. I like to find it as creative piece rather than an autobiography. The time ...actually difficult times are ahead and only those who sounds signals are required now. Always in history it may be like that , in different styles and ways. But this is period of genderlessness. New weapons matter.

carry on........


M P Ramesh

[Brad P]

Great story. I enjoyed the style and prose. Keep it up!

[dan]

Being protected from harm, even if self-inflicted, is one thing we expect from life's wisdom. The problem, however, is life's ability to be so unfair. Love comes and goes and love does not always equal happiness. The wait for the perfect match may be futile or fruitful but waiting may always be preferable to making disastrous and impetuous decisions. Patience, be my guide.
A very personal sounding write, Kathryn. If you have been hurt my thoughts support healing. take care...dan

[Nisreen]

I like your closing line
Yes
i guess we wait for someone who knows how to love
and its no fun bumping into all these weird guys that push their way into your life
But i believe we are all protected somehow from harm
you make me think so much and i really do get so engaged in your work

[Kathryn Smith]

Ah thank you so much! Yes. I am still very disturbed that I was even talking to him..and now as I re read our messages it is all the more creepy. I'm glad I make you think and it's not too boring! Take care! x

[Coyote Poetry]

I did enjoy the amazing tale. I like the feel of mystery and the thoughts. Escape and fearful reasons. Perfect reasons for a outstanding story.
Coyote

[samparks,sam]

really so lovely around me your word still . I like .

[Alucard6336]

Well, I suppose I'm still awake, as always. I like the imagery here. It seems indirect as supposed to what I might do. In other words people think I'm smart but I'm really not.

I've held back words but they aren't bad ones. I'm just used to walking on eggshells my whole life. My curse is humanity.

Why didn't you message me?

And is this a true story about an attempted to lure people? I love humans but that one deserves to be skinned.

Good work.

[Gaurav]

In a world of fake appreciations, finding a true love seems to be a daunting task. But, as they say, love will find a way. The only thing needed is pureness of heart.
I enjoyed your story of searching self. Good work. Keep it up.

[Kathryn Smith]

Thank you very much my friend! xo