Stainless

Stainless

A Poem by Eve

Today I brushed the remnants of you
off my soul, swept the invalid pieces 
of imposed inadequacy under my bed
as if they never existed.

Forgave my canvas for the juxtapose;
maybe I can't paint myself into a safe
place to lay your cause, though It was
not from the lack of honest endeavor,
It was too hard to be only what you needed.

So hard in fact that I lost sight of what
I needed, it was all about you, and
everything about you mattered.
I wanted to give you freedom from lewd
pulchritude so I hid it well,
too well...

Blush as a puerile bum, I peeled you from
the sinew in glowing ribbons of contrition,
tore at the frame 'til it shone
like mad chrome sunlight.

Today, I am immaculate,
I am reborn into myself
a burning wing of phoenix
I am my own soul,
rising from the wreckage
pristine from ash and flame
I am stainless, steel to shame
for what you could not see in me
I give myself a name,
and that name is love.

© 2012 Eve


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I liked it until I thought of the poor lil dust bunnies beneath the bed choking and hacking over those "imposed inadequacies" until the whoorah just shook and rattled the windows so much the neighbors called the cops complaining of the noise. And when the cops came their incessant knocking finally caught your attention and totally derailed your thoughts until tomorrow! And we all know "Tomorrow never comes..." so your poem poofed and then...and then.... I can't remember anymore... but it was terrible aweful ya know?

Posted 12 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

This is a really nice poem, it all sounds so real without any need of imaginations one can understand it through his heart. I feel like close my eyes and let it echoes in my mind slowly, the last lines.

I am my own soul,
rising from the wreckage
pristine from ash and flame
I am stainless, steel to shame
for what you could not see in me
I give myself a name,
and that name is love.

You have given the poem a true touch of inspiration. Very nicely written and composition of flow of words is excellent. I love it.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Metaphorically enlightening images enhance your soulful musings...This reader connects to every word and thought as if I have walked this path before, knowing another could narrate the journey far better than I.
When we somehow feel we are not enough or "too" this and that we need to listen quietly and carefully to our souls. It's all there...always has been and always will be.
"I am my own soul,
rising from the wreckage
pristine from ash and flame
I am stainless, steel to shame
for what you could not see in me
I give myself a name,
and that name is love."

Well... "love"...aka Somerista...Nice to meet you and your beautiful soul...I love this poem...


Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I very much liked the following ...

"Today, I am immaculate,
I am reborn into myself
a burning wing of phoenix
I am my own soul,"

I did though, note that in ...

"So hard in fact that I lost site of what"

that it would seem that "sight" is the word you want there.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Fantastic poem here! I absolutely love the theme, the title is perfect and the usage of words like "pulchritude" and "puerile" makes this writing even more powerful. I adore these lines the most: " I peeled you from
the sinew in glowing ribbons of contrition,tore at the frame 'til it shone
like mad chrome sunlight." - this is brilliant! And an amazing end...keep up the good work!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Fantastic write! I know this feeling do well, to put your loved one before yourself. To sacrifice all in a selfless endeavor to make your partner happy. And then you slowly begin to find yourself when you finally abandon the comfort zone of routine. I loved the line, "a burning wing of phoenix, I am my own soul, rising from the wreckage. Pristine from ash and flame; I am stainless, steel to shame." So profound! The metaphors themselves are pristine, perfect little pearls of wisdom wrought from self affirmation.... by far one of my very favorites of your work. Exceptional poem, truly touching. :')

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on June 11, 2012
Last Updated on June 12, 2012

Author

Eve
Eve

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