Toxic Moods

Toxic Moods

Love is like the breeze - having the power to drift people between countries in one bang without hearing a single scream. Santa clause eh? Doesn’t a Santa Clause spread contentment and joy? So why can’t love do that? At this point I shrugged.  I could not have stopped fangirling and fantasizing how I’d love being Summer Finn from 500 Days of Summer.  “She is like the wind” (Plays in the background when Tom Hansen, an averagely perfect boy falls in love with Summer, the one with flamboyant temperaments)~ I’d say, love is like the wind. It comes, you feel it, and goes away. Nobody can catch hold of it forever. I knew I was wrong being the cynical one, but don’t people break apart when love leaves away only hope and disappointments? 

I understood, an averagely perfect boy couldn’t be in love with the one with colorful moods. That’s where the biggest flaw exists. Well, I guess I figured that too late.                    

     

As I stood there staring people hold hands and laughing, I had realized that the only reason I agreed to the proposal was because I wanted him to be happy, and not because I cared for him, but only because I did not want to be the bad girl. If only could I be a good person, maybe he would forgive me. That’s exactly why I decided to stay with him. 

You knew I’d die without you. You knew it was simply impossible for me to stay alone. At that moment, all I could ask for was leaving away your happiness for mine. For once, I knew this would be not likely because you are the bad one. I wonder what is wrong in being good. I wonder why he could not be with me.                                                               

I would have only known this better now. Seeing you from that aloofness, I knew it was the end and perhaps it was for the good. As I stood there looking over the fields, I couldn’t have seen anything better. But I knew it upfront, it wouldn’t go anywhere. I had no intents to talk but I had to know the truth.

 

 

He said that he had to leave me because he loved me. He knew he had been too hard on me. He said I was not allowed to smile or laugh with others. He said I should only do what I was supposed to. I did not smile. I did not laugh. He comes over suddenly and says, ‘I should be going. You never listened. ’ I shrugged and wondered why he could not stay if he cared and then I realized that if I stay with one person for his happiness, maybe he could forgive me.

 

"I really like you" he said

"Why didn’t you tell me?" I asked

"Because you would go away one day…" he said while looking down and left me alone in the crowd.

 

 

At this moment. I knew what Mr. Perfect really meant.