Flying Advice (Chapter 1) - The Boarding Pass

Flying is something I love!

Me-       "No No No 

                It is not like catching a bus or something.. 

                      is a very big thing"

Someone- "Oh, is it?'

Me-  'Yes, it is indeed, 

       You got to book it in advance 

       Make sure you get a decent price 

 After all you are taking a flight'

Someone- 'Oh, I see!' 

Me- 'Yes..

And on the day 

Make sure you arrive 

Like three hours in advance 

You don't want to risk it to chance!

You show them your ticket 

They will then weigh your bags, 

Make sure its not loaded with a lot of garbage 

'Cos they can see right through your luggage'

Someone-  'Right through my luggage?!?!?!'

Me- 'Yes...

They have these x-ray machines

Tell you what; they are very keen..

Don't be afraid if some dog sniffs your shoes 

That is what the dogs are paid to do! 

Someone-  'Dogs are paid to do?

This isn't like catching a bus, no way'

Me-  'You're right, Let's continue..

Then you get your 'Boarding Pass' 

That will tell you where to sit 

Don't mess up 

Make sure you ready for the security s**t 

They will scan your body, tip to toe

Make sure you got no no knives or rifles on you! 

Someone-  'They will see me right through?'

Me-  'Yes...

They can even read your mind..

If they think you're safe and sound 

They will let you in..

Don't be too flattered at the duty free heaven 

Before you know you will have no pounds to count!! 

Someone- 'But its free you said?'

Me- 'Never mind..

just be easy on the booze 

You got to make sure you show some standards 

Sit in a corner, grab a Starbucks 'Chai Tea Latte' 

And just relax..

Read a posh magazine and don't stare at people 

Some VIPs don't like the glare! 

Someone- 'Then..What should I do? 

Me- 'Never miss a sight of the departure screen 

And don't snooze..

Listen to what that lady says and follow her right through, 

When the gates open 

Get up graciously 

And head along with the crowd..

Be patient, let the VIPs enter first 

Then the old, the kids and other elite crowd..

Someone- 'I get that..'

Me- 'Now listen, 

The most important bit 

Smile back at the beautiful lady at the entrance 

She is your host in the air 

But don't smile too much, 

Will show how dumb you are!'  

Author's Note

Educational Matter just for fun! Enjoy..

Reviews

[Pete Langley]

I think this is quite mischeivious, young lady - multi-faceted mickey taking!
There`s a lot here about knowing your place in all sorts of situations, I thiink.
Excellent. P.

[PP]

Hahaha Pete Thank you thank you and thank you! You're falcon eyes have seen it right through! :)