For that I sit on the shore

Written on the shore right next to my college...

For blues is what I choose
For I play but always lose
For I never fight but I end up with a bruise

For I welcome a new day
For I have always something to say
For I hope and I pray

For I need a place to cry
For I never lie
For I'll eventually die

For deception is our age
For "civilization" is our cage
For we have anger but with no rage

For rocks break the waves in two
For skies makes the clouds blue
For I have no solution and have no clue

For that, and more
I'll be the one sitting on the shore
For that and more
When the doors are closed, open you'll find my door

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Note for reviewers : I've reversed some of the images in this poem like;
"For skies makes the clouds blue" While clouds are making skies white
.... I just wanted to make the poem feels as much disturbed as possible because that's how I was disturbed...

Author's Note

Now I think I maybe not that bad... Thanks every one for the real encouraging reviews...

Thank you "Truman S. Booth" for the grammatical check

@Intern'l Shultzfeather : I guess this poem is about how disturbed life could be and how people just don't accept true so truthful will end up a lone and away from all the others... The shore, in my case.

Thank you everyone, really ...

Peace

Reviews

[MissWordSmith]

Okay, honestly speaking, I did not find the level of this poem to be extremely good, but the little messages in it were lovely!

I especially liked,

"For deception is our age
For "civilization" is our cage"
"For we have anger but with no rage"

really brilliant lines there amigo. keep writing!

[Fuzzy_Poluzah]

I TAKE BACK THE I HATE U'S I SENT U ....forgive please....You rok, I SAID PLEASE!

[Chipgirl]

well i like it too :)

[Mauricio Montoya]

I'd think twice before I'd say it’s not good, it’s like a song it’s got rhythm and rhyme. The beauty of poetry is in the eyes of the reader, there will always be somebody who will care. Excellent write.

[Kate Hunter]

the rhyme scheme is so well done. I like the poem, whether you were disturbed or not. As pathetic as this sounds, I love feeling disturbed because that is when my best work is inspired.

[Short.Nerd]

I like it. :)

Love the rhymes!

[Julie Beth]

i like how it rhymes good job :)

[YouoweYoupay]

I love sitting on the shore. And many of the words in this write are simple. true. and beautiful. Excellent poem. Thank you for sharing.

[Truman S. Booth]

This is a very good poem. While I read it, I could see the ocean, hear the waves, feel the sand beneath my legs with a pen and paper in my hand. The repeating initial word, "For," kept a steady flow despite the poem's unset meter. Very good.

I saw two grammar mistakes you may want to take a peek at. I always hesitate editing poems, because it may have been on purpose. But I'll let you know anyway, and you can decide whether or not to heed my advice.

paragraph 5 line 1: "rocks breaks" should be "rocks break"

p5l3: the word "clew" should be spelled "clue"

Overall, a wonderful poem. Well crafted, personal, yet connectible. Well done.

[Aven]

this poem becomes so much better when put in context... I don't agree with your author's note... atall.

[Intern'l Shultzfeather]

I like the newness of it and watching how your mind is moving. Beaten in blues. Losing and bruising. Then you speak true and cry (Are you saying your truth is not widely accepted?) Then I feel a storm with your knowing about the deception, civ cage figment, anger/no cage construct of thought. The no clue must tear you up. Knowing and not knowing is what I hear you say. Then a flip to the door where we see a beaten poet--that's what having all the answers does.