Deepest fears always come alive

A short writing about my deepest fear.

Here I am. Alone.

I'm walking down the street in the dark. I'm two minutes away from my best friend's house. We had a fight - a serious one. Not one that a friendship easily recovers from. A terrible green monster took shape between us. It's called Envy. Once it starts feeding from you, it will only get bigger. That's what what I tried to tell her. She wouldn't listen.

All these thoughts are dancing in a crazy manner inside my head. I am so distracted that I don't even pay attention to where I am heading. The streets are darker than before. I think I know this junction - or not. I'm lost in my thoughts. I'm lost out there too.

I hear a rustle coming from the bushes on the side of the road. With the corner of my eye I catch a glimpse of a shadow. I try not to panic. If I show that I am scared, it will only get whorse. I walk at a quicker pace. I hear another sound from the same direction. It is following me. Is it a man ? Is it someting else? The only thing I know is that I have to avoid it. The streets are even darker, but it won't be wise to turn around.

I'm walking faster, even running. A quick thought of my friend comes in my mind. Would she be worried if she knew ? Of course she would. But that doesn't matter for now. I hurt her. My words jabbed her in her chest, wounding her heart fatally. She was the only person I had left. She loved me more than anyone else, but I hurt her.

Here I am. Alone. I'm about to get hurt too. I dont hear steps but i know it is coming closer. It is faster than me. As it is closing by, the world around me is getting darker. Pitch black. I am sprinting now. My heart pumps at a crazy pace. I am horrified. I don't know where to run. I turn left. It does the same. Cold sweat is running on my face. My only thought is her. I think of her disappearing in the darkness. The same darkness I am headed to right now.

S**t! It's a dead end. A tall stone wall is erected in front of me. No place to hide. No room to run past the thing that follows me.

Its ultimatelly here. An enormous shadow casted over me. Is anyone worried about me ? I will never know. I can feel the cold that awaits me. I need a warm hug. A warm hug from her. I turn around to face it.

Here I am. Alone.
I am alone, facing my deepest fear.
Here I am. Alone.
My fear is right in front of me.
Here I am. Alone.
I'm alone. That's my deepest fear.

Author's Note

This is my first submission. Please leave any constructive comment. I will deeply appreciate it.

Reviews

[Melissa]

I really love the metaphors in this and the parallels of being emotionally lost and physically lost. I like the way that you capture the feeling of being alone somewhere where you don't feel safe and use it to show how someone can feel unsafe when alone with their thoughts, especially after an event where they hurt someone and got hurt. The stream of conscious narrative you have here works well with conveying those feelings, especially yhe way the mind jumps around a bit when someone is upset and scared. I enjoyed this a lot!!

My only complaint about it at all is this part feels a little forced:
"I hurt her. My words jabbed her in her chest, wounding her heart fatally. She was the only person I had left. She loved me more than anyone else, but I hurt her."
It makes me think of the advice "show, don't tell" I think a better way to convey this emotion and the friend's hurt would be to maybe flash back to the moment to show the friend being hurt, like talk about the look of hurt in her eyes or how she couldn't look at you after what you said, or the tears brimming in her eyes - those kinds of things.

Over all, I enjoyed this a lot! You did a very good job and I'm excited to see more from you!

[Orion]

Τhis is a very good suggestion and I will consider it for sure in the future. Thank you for reading my work and I appreciate the comments!

[matrixmark]

Good read. I loved this piece. Fear comes in many shapes and forms - you described it brilliantly.

Mark.