Fighting The War Within

Based on Personal Experiences and Fears

Between 5th and 6th grade, everything changed. School became a lot harder, and everyone suddenly developed a personal vendetta against me. As the year progressed, My circle of friends grew more and more scarce, to the point where there was only one friend left. I struggled and struggled, feeling like I jumped out of a plane with no parachute. However, this was only the beginning.

During my 7th grade year, I struggled academically-wise even more. To the point that I would hide or destroy report cards before my parents could see them. I would lie about having friends and having a good time at school. The truth was even more grim. My friend and I went into a period in our lives on not communicating with one another. It was during this period that I would grow more angry, and would eventually start having conversations with myself thinking there was another person talking to me.

During my 8th grade year, things intensified. I could no longer decipher the specific lies with the truth. I could no longer decipher the imaginary people with real people, and I could no longer care about my academics. I grew hostile, refusing to talk to those who let me fall on my face, refusing to talk to a counselor about grades. It was during that time that the imaginary people began show up in my dreams, haunting my and scaring me awake. I cried every night, wishing that my "friends" would leave me alone.

By the time my freshman year came along, I was one straw away from a total psychotic meltdown. I became increasingly more paranoid about my "friends." They by this time have transcended the dreamworld into the physical world, popping up at school and at home. They tortured me psychologically. I was always a quiet student in class, but that trend ended. When I would out of no where ask in a panicked tone, "Why are you here?" Everyone would look as I would talk to my "friends" and only I could see them. Everyone became increasing more concerned over my mental status, even to break the communication silence between that one friend and I. 

It was in 10th grade that I became ill and stayed home from school. My father handed me his gun and told me me to use it in an emergency. I laid on the couch, and just started thinking. My thoughts were rushing to different subjects from "How I would have lived life differently?" to "Why me?" and among other things, "Why won't you leave me alone?" These thoughts went on for hours until finally one of the demons I called my "friend" appeared in the hallway. I screamed and grabbed the gun, firing all the bullets in the magazine into the demon. He disappeared as soon as the first round hit him. Finally, the slide locked back open, signifying it was out of ammo, but that still didn't stop me from trying to shoot more bullets. I then threw the gun off the the side, curled up in the fettle position and began crying like like I haven't cried before. It wasn't long that the police stormed in the door and found me.

"Are you OK?" asks one of the officers.

"Just get them away from me!" is what I said.

The officer then told the other one

"Any bodies?"

"Negative, just 15 9 mm bullet holes."

"This kid has lost it."

At that moment, my friend showed up, out of breath he said.

"Oh, no."

"What is kid?" asked the officer

"He broke down didn't he?"

"Preliminary examination would say so."

The cops escorted me to the squad car where I would then spend the night in a mental hospital. My real friend would break down the whole situation to my parents. I finally calmed down that night, I didn't see anyone of those demons in my room or in my dreams, It was the first time I was able to sleep comfortably in almost 2 years. That night, my grandfather visited me in my dreams. This was strange as I have never met the man, he died before I was born.

"Its time" he said

"Time for what?

"Time for you to accept the lord into your heart."

"Why should I do that?"

"He is the key to healing your wounds, to help you correct the wrongs you have done. You have reached the lowest part of your life. It is here that the heart is the most accepting of the lords love. Goodbye now."

I woke up in disbelief. That was the most real dream I had ever had.

I then got on my belly and started to pray. I pleaded with god to just accept me and love me.

The next day I got discharged, my parents welcomed me with open arms, and no charges were filed against me. I stayed at home the rest of the day, the demons didn't bother me once. The next day at school, everyone started to talk to me, and I eventually made a few good friends. Thank God, I only had to live through that once.

NOTE: Purely fictitious, but based on true experiences, although not as extreme.

Reviews

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

I enjoyed reading this, it showed great emotion. It would be a scary situation to have voices inside your head or see images like this, it's bad enough dealing with negative thoughts that fill our heads. I like how you ended it, showing that God can take all these bad things away and make someone new.

Great Job

[Harrison Sherif]

I appreciate your feedback, thank you very much!

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

You're welcome ^^