Wedding Plans

David and Heather discuss various wedding topics; Heather makes good on her promise... sort of.

 

INT. DAVID’S HOUSE. DAVID and HEATHER are sitting at the kitchen table rummaging through wedding magazines and such nonsense. HEATHER is wearing a long-sleeve, turtle neck and is basically completely covered.

 

DAVID

I don’t care what flowers we have, I just want the wedding to happen.

 

HEATHER

Yeah, yeah—you just can’t wait for that honeymoon, can you?

 

DAVID

No, I’m not being a pervert. I just wish it was over.

 

HEATHER

Right.

 

DAVID

Seriously.

 

HEATHER

Well, then why not? You don’t want me?

 

DAVID

Well, yeah—but no… I’m in dangerous territory right now. I need a distraction.

 

AWKWARD PAUSE while HEATHER glares at DAVID.

 

DAVID

Lilacs!

 

HEATHER

No, daisies!

 

DAVID

Alright, alright. Daisies. (to self) Perfect.

 

HEATHER

What?

 

DAVID

Nothing.

 

HEATHER

Oh, yeah… there was something I was supposed to ask you for somebody else.

 

DAVID

For who?

 

HEATHER

I think it was Nathan.

 

DAVID

Oh, let me guess—Going Nowhere?

 

HEATHER

Yeah, that was it.

 

DAVID

No.

 

HEATHER

Thank you. (beat) So, moving on to the bouquet.

 

DAVID

I thought we decided on daisies.

 

HEATHER

No, the daisies are for the bridesmaids.

 

DAVID

Why can’t they all just be daisies?

 

HEATHER

Because I’m the bride, therefore I’m special and deserve something better than daisies.

 

DAVID

What’s wrong with daisies?

 

HEATHER

Nothing—except that everybody else has them!

 

DAVID

Fine. Lilacs.

 

HEATHER

No, what is it with you and lilacs?

 

DAVID

It’s the only flower I know, besides the rose.

 

HEATHER

Well, you know what a daisy is.

 

DAVID

No.

 

HEATHER

Then why were you just defending daisies?

 

DAVID

I wasn’t, I was just curious.

 

HEATHER

Alright, tell you what. Let’s leave the bouquet for now and focus on hairstyles for the bridesmaids. (grabs a stack of magazines)

 

DAVID

(sarcastic) Great.

 

 

END SCENE.

 

Reviews

[Chainsaw Enema]

Dandelions are soooo much better.