Vivid Dream #426

Spring 2020

It was Finals week for me, and I had a dream we saw each other again while taking the same class in college.

In the dream, you were on the far right of the class, on the end row and I saw your head pop up when she was calling roll down the aisle. I saw you through other people moving and it was like time slowed down. I was on the far left, end row. I strained my neck to see you, trying not to seem too obvious, but I had to be sure. Papers and people obstructing my view, but as soon as I saw the blonde hair, I eased back into my chair and quietly tried to act normal. After class, in the hall, you smiled at me and asked me to come back to your house after school, but I wanted to be home to see my boyfriend that night and declined. I was thinking that might be a bad idea to see you and I was trying to stay loyal. I remember thinking of your smile and how mischievous you looked. And then another time you asked me, and I said Yes. Even in a dream, I couldn’t say No to you.

We somehow ended up in a music school in NYC at night and we held hands tightly. It was open 24 hours and it was massive. Doors opening to corridors to classrooms to more of the same. There were snacks on the shelves in every class in case you became hungry. There were musical instruments everywhere, even in the halls: Tables stacked with recording equipment, horns, every type of instrument you could imagine. Chairs on checkered tile hallways spreading out before us like an infinite highway. Students were walking and playing everywhere, but not as many as would be there during the day. You played guitar and I slid between guitar and piano. There was one guitar I picked up that was massive, like a double neck, but it was a triple and I almost dropped it, but you caught the end and smiled at me. Every time you smiled at me in the dream; it was like a halo of light shone upon you. It was an intoxicating place to be with you. Suddenly, there were beds everywhere and we were making out in one giant bed in the hallway. We had sheets wrapped around us, clothes thrown to the floor and I was blooming in the corridor’s light. You kissed me, looked down at me and said, “Why do it here when we can go to my house and have privacy?”, so we left.

Somehow, we were at my parent’s house and were waking up the next day. My parents were sitting on a green couch drinking coffee and watching the news when we emerged from my bedroom. My mother was unclear, but my dad was in perfect focus. I left you on the couch with my dad while I went in the kitchen but forgot to introduce you. Realizing my mistake a few minutes later, I told my dad you were my study partner and he gave you a high five and called you my protector. We go into another room and we are back at the school in NYC and we are rummaging through instruments again, like I’m trying to find a harmonica at the bottom of a box of flutes. Sadly, dawn is coming, and we need to leave before school starts. So, we set off on skateboards in the streets with our dogs on leashes, like men setting off on sleighs with wolves in the snow. Then I woke up, and I missed you so terribly much.