A Christmas Retail Carol

A very loosely version of the Christmas Carol, if the so-called Scrooge was an overworked sales associate that has a very good reason to be cranky at the world. WARNING: Bad words censored out.

A Christmas Retail Carol

by omegax45

 

                        On Christmas Eve during 2019, a woman in her early forties had locked up the doors to her store with a sigh.  She didn’t own the store, as the store was owned by a nationwide retail corporation and she had been all alone that day.  The last time there had been a store manager was years ago and, being the oldest employee to that store, she ended up as the unofficial acting manager and the store had remained short-staffed most of the time.  Thankfully, the corporation had the stores closed for Christmas Day, so she can relax tomorrow morning before heading off to her parents’ house.  Some companies were considering keeping their stores open for Christmas Day to make more money, but the corporation she worked for had refused too remain open.  Many people were still protesting about stores being open on Thanksgiving after all.

                        She headed home and got changed, feeding her dog and letting him outside to do his business before making a small meal for herself.  She could hear the wind howling with the coming of a storm outside and she bundled herself up under a thick blanket to keep the chill away.  Her dog cuddled into her side and she lost herself in a movie on her television, thankful to find at least one that wasn’t about Christmas.

                        Now don’t get this woman wrong.  She loved Christmas.  She loved spending time with her family, giving and receiving presents, having a home-cooked meal while talking about better times long passed, and catching up on the latest news with her relatives.  It was the days leading up to Christmas that made her ill terribly.  It actually made all retail associates of all types of businesses terribly ill and downright miserable.  She could rant about the all the reason why, but most people would consider them petty and flat-out ridiculous.  Unless of course, the person she was ranting to was a fellow retail associate.  She was starting to feel her stomach begin to upturn just by thinking about it, so she turned back to the movie and tried to bury those depressing and anger-fueling thoughts into the back of her head for awhile.

                        “Marthaaaa…..”

                        “Hm,” said woman looked up from her dozing, feeling her dog become tense as he looked around, “Did somebody call me?”

                        “Maaaaaarrrrrttttthhhhaaaaaaaa…….”

                        “Creepy ghost voices are not funny,” Martha stated, sitting up straight, “and I am superstitious, so please come on out so we can talk.  I want to finish this movie and then go to bed.”

                        There was a pause as the air in the room became several degrees colder, then a figure appeared sitting in her armchair, Martha recognizing the transparent figure before her and her stomach began to hurt along with her head again.

                        “I see that you recognized me Martha,” the figure… spirit said, the chains holding large shopping bags rattling with each breath she took or each work she said, “Didn’t expect to see me so soon, I take it?”

                        “You were at my store a few hours ago,” Martha stated, “I cannot fathom that you could have died in such a short amount of time.”

                        “Anyone can die at the drop of a hat,” the spirit tsked, “but you’re right.  I’m not dead yet.  Just in an alcohol coma from all the drinks I had at the Christmas Eve party I was telling you about.”

                        “Best to return to your body right now before the Grim Reaper finds you,” Martha advised, “and leave at peace, Donna.  I would like my Christmas Eve not to be further ruined by an irate entitled customer pretending to be dead just to annoy me some more.”

                        “How dare you,” Donna nearly spat angrily, “I came all this way to help someone as young as you to teach you how to properly treat your customers, so you should appreciate my sacrifice.  You can be a starry example of my help and get the promotion you have been denied for so long due to your attitude.”

                        “Please do enlighten me on how to do my job,” Martha asked sarcastically, “A job I have been doing for nine years while you have what?  Zero experience with? And also, do enlighten me once again how it is my fault that I made a product to the specifications you gave me, said specifications you botched up on, because you refused to take me advice and have a professional installer measure for said product for you for a small fee.  A fee that YOU screamed in my face was highway robbery and I was a thief and a terrorist for trying to charge you for the services of an independent installer that is in no form or way an employee of my corporation and had signed a contract with said corporation to guarantee his work or he would buy you a new product out of his pocket.  Yes, do tell me why a professional that is not on my corporation’s payroll has to offer his services for free to measure and install a product he does not sell.  And then tell me why I have to override my corporation’s policy of no refunds once the product is made and out of my store.”

                        “And that is why you need help.  You give no leeway for people in need or help someone that has a tight budget.  Your attitude towards someone that is trying to help you and see the error of your ways is unacceptable.”

                        “Drinking yourself into a coma to come bother me while your kids are worried sick about you and complaining about money when you are rolling in it is unacceptable.  I used to work in jewelry.  I know a twenty grand wedding ring set when I see it.”

                        “Your denial is outstanding.”

                        “So says the expert of denial.”

                        “Anyway, you will be visited upon by three spirits of retail this very night.  The first will be coming soon.  I would need their words before something bad happens to you.”

                        “And you should’ve heed mine beforehand,” Martha pointed behind Donna, “because now something bad’s gonna happen to you.”

                        “Huh” Donna uttered before she was hauled out of the armchair by a being in a tattered robe and tossed over its shoulder, “Put me down you *******! Do you know who I am?!!  I will have your job for this!!!”

                        “Rough night,” Martha asked the figure as it turned towards her.

                        “One could only imagine,” the figure sighed, ignoring Donna punching and kicking him while her shopping bags rattle and swing around, “She’ll be tossed into her body and be told her liver is dying by the doctors, like with every heavy drinker out there.  I do not understand why humans do such things to themselves.”

                        “Arrogance is one of mankind’s greatest faults,” Martha answered simply, “What she said about the spirits…”

                        “Yeah, they’re coming.  Lady would not stop pestering them until they agreed.  So humor them, or just tell them how it is.  I’ll be seeing you in several decades.”

                        “At least I know I have some time left to get my will ready.”

                        “Don’t you ignore me you ******,” Donna screeched angrily, “You racist ******!! I’ll call the police and tell them you assaulted me and **** me!!  You’ll never be able to work anywhere again!!!”

                        “Now that is very rude and inaccurate,” the figure replied calmly as they disappeared, “I was your great grandfather when I was alive.  What had my descendants been teaching you….”

                        Martha laid back and sighed once they were out of sight.  However, she could not relax again, especially when her dog still growling from where the two spirits once were.  Her night of relaxation was ruined and she was certain she would not get a wink of sleep this night.  Damned entitled customer.  She really did not need this.  Not at all.

                        She got up and went into the kitchen, her dog following her as she began to make coffee.  She normally would stay away from caffeine after 8:00 P.M. to avoid a night of tossing and turning on her bed, but if she was going to be bothered all night from visitors, she was definitely gonna rely on her insomnia to keep her lucid enough to voice her arguments.

                        Wen she came back in her living room, she found a new figure sitting in her armchair.  She walked over to see it was a middle-aged gentleman dressed in a fine suit and his hair swept back neatly.  He had an old custom-made pipe in hand that he was smoking from and he was listening to a Christmas song from the television.  She sat down on her couch again and the gentleman noticed her.

                        “Good evening,” he greeted her, taking a breath out of his pipe, “How are you doing this holiday season?”

                        “Was doing better until a comatose irate entitled customer decided that I am on the clock at all times despite not getting paid right now,” Martha nearly grumbled, “Are you one of the spirits Donna hired to ‘help’ me?”

                        "Indeed I am," the gentleman tossed his pip into the air, which disappeared a second later, and extended his free hand to her, "Name's Johnson McWillis, and I am your Spirit of Christmas Retail Past tonight."

                        "Martha Jenkins," Martha shook his hand, "Overworked sales associate and supposedly free labor customer service representative."

                        "Don't I hear you," Johnson sat back in the armchair, "Retail isn't what it used to be.  I'm just thankful I am out of the game now.  These days, I spend my time looking back at the good ol' days."

                        "I got a fellow employee that likes to reminisce on the old days," Martha said, "How most things were pennies and employees dressed more appropriately than today's standards, or lack of I should say."

                        "So true," the television flickered to a screen from an old show, showing a retail associate and a customer, "Things were much simpler back then.  Kids were taught to get ready for the working world and enjoy their free time when they had the chance to.  Education was the most important thing along with experience.  Starting at the bottom and working your way to the top gives kids hindsight and appreciation for what they had, where they came from, and how far they made it on their own.  You know, so they can set an example to their own kids.

                        "When I was starting out, I used to work at a hot dog stand during carnivals to save money for college, or that latest toy I had my eyes on for months.  Between carnivals, I would mow lawns or shovel snow for the neighbors.  During college, I got a job selling gentlemen wear at a department store when not in classes.  By the time I left for military duty, I had been promoted to store manager.  Had plenty of leftover money for retirement after I was discharged, but I kept working to show my kids and grandkids what a hard day's work looked like.

                        "And I had fun in retail.  Customers came up to my fellow employees and I with questions, we gave answers with suggestions that we were thanked for.  Customers left with a smile, stores got richer.  Someone had a problem, we fix it no problem.  Unless they were trying to scam us.  And Believe me, I had a few back then."

                        "I am assuming those scammers were few and far between," Martha stated lightly.

                        "Not as few as you would think," Johnsons corrected, "IT used to be a few a week.  Easily deflectable.  The higher ups always defended their employees and the policies of their stores unless the employee in question was in the wrong.  We had strived to make customer service top priority and was proud of it.  The original motto was 'The customer is always right", and it worked on getting a large crowd of customers every time it was used.  It was intended to help employees give their all for a sale so the customers would come back.  Who knew it could backfire on us later."

                        "I am most certain that the creators of that motto are rolling in their graves each time a customer abuses it."

                        "I agree.  You once gave your all to customers, making so many happy when you started out in retail."

                        "My mom tried to talk me out of working in retail," Martha said fondly as the television screen changed to show a younger version of Martha working in a retail store in a mall, "She told me to try for an office job, but I was in my last year of high school and needed a quick job for the weekends.  Who knew that taking a retail job that the world would decide that retail would be the only profession for me."

                        "That tends to be the norm if you don't move up in your employment," Johnson informed, "The higher ups think you are comfortable as a retail associate and therefore will keep thinking of you as one that likes the thrill of a sale and the high pace environment.  Even if you decide to get an office job elsewhere, they will see you as a retail associate that will quit weeks later due to boredom."

                        "It's little wonder that office jobs have anyone in employment," Martha commented dryly.

                        "Anyway," Johnson stood up, "My time is up.  It's good talking to you, Martha.  Keep up the good work out there and don't give up on trying for your ideal job."

                        "Thank you," Martha shook his hand again, "Actually, before you go, I was wondering why you stopped at just the beginning of my retail career?  It feels like a cliffhanger."

                        "That's because you still do good work even to this day," Johnson answered as he faded away, "No need to comb through it further.  Merry Christmas."

                        "Merry Christmas," Martha replied and she was alone once again.

                        A moment later, she took a sip of her coffee and frowned upon finding it cold.  She headed back into the kitchen and put the mug into the microwave to heat it up.  After a minute, she pulled the steaming mug out of the microwave and took a sip.  She welcomed the warmth going down her throat and headed back to the living room.  Upon reaching the entranceway, she found yet another visitor sitting in her armchair.

                        The newcomer was a woman wearing a fancy dress suit and drinking a martini.  She was staring at the dark screen of the television.  She appeared to be exhausted with everything and wished the world would go away.  fearing that this would take awhile, Martha sat back down and drank from her mug.

                        "Good evening my dear," the woman greeted, taking a sip of her martini that seemed to never be empty, "I hope you don't mind if I have a drink."

                        "Help yourself so long as you don't plan on destroying my stuff," Martha replied, her dog staring at the woman, "I believe you are the Spirit of Christmas Retail Present?"

                        "Indeed," the woman confirmed, "My name is Karen Sterling.  And no, I am not like those awful women that are called Karen.  I hate how people would use my name to identify those nasty women."

                        "I am still trying to figure that out," Martha replied, "Along with Chad or Krissy.  I just call them kidults, because they act like children in adult bodies and think they're back in school bullying other kids again.  Except they act like that evil cartoon character when he gets the power of authority.  Whatever his name is."

                        "That's good one," Karen laughed, "Kidult.  Makes perfect sense to me.  Anyway, I'm sure we'll be here all night with the thousands of stories of the horrors of retail at this point in time."

                        "Tell me about it.  Companies used to protect their policies and beliefs along with their employees from such abuse.  No refunds means no refunds.  You threatened an employee, you are banned.  No, you cannot get a refund for eating all of that sandwich just because you somehow felt it was unsatisfactory once you ate the last bite. 

                        "Now a days, all a customer has to say is boo and the upper management is treating him or her like a queen and giving them whatever they want and then some.  I had a guy on the phone once threaten to shoot my installer the next time he saw him just because he got hung up on another job and couldn't call him at a precise time to setup an installation date.  Next thing I know, customer service is issuing a refund and giving the guy his order and I'm the one being reprimanded for not 'dealing with it better'.  They did not believe me when I said the guy threatened bodily harm to the installer, and asked them about the phone recording that we tell customers about while they wait for someone to pick up.  They laughed and told me they lied about that and they didn't have the money for such a thing."

                        "Oh, honey.  That's just child's play.  In my day, I had a nice couple come in for some beauty products that had to be ordered.  I had told them that what they wanted was on back order for a month, and they were okay with it.  A month later, the wife comes in screaming at me that I didn't tell her about the back order and wanted her order and our current sale applied to it.  She had ordered the products on a different sale, and I had written on her contact about the back order and told her I cannot do double sales on an order.  She had the nerve to call her lawyer to sue me and the company just as her order came in.  She even claimed that I called her a variety of names and my fellow employees stood by me in my defense.  My manager?  Hell no.  I got written up and that horrible woman got double sales.  I later learned on my day off that her husband came in to say the order was wrong and wanted new stuff while keeping the old stuff.  Management asked me what should I do, and I told them to take care of it after handing in my resignation.  I was walking out just as one of my fellow employees were crying as another man was tearing into her over compound colors."

                        "I'm surprised that a man was into compound make up," Martha commented curiously.

                        "Make up is no longer for woman, I assure you.  And not just make up artist.

                        "Anyway, there are many reasons why customers are the way they are today.  Some would blame it on the weather, if it was gloomy for awhile and no sunshine for days.  Some would blame it on them just having a bad day and need to take it out on someone.  And that someone is usually the person that can't fight back.  Or maybe that person is being just who they are.

                        "Personally, I blame it on society and the economy as a whole."

                        "How so?"

                        "As you know, most women used to stay home and take care of the children while men went to work and make the money.  Over time, thanks to the Baby Booming Age and the population skyrocketed, so too did prices everywhere.  Both parents had to go to work and either the grandparents watched the kids or they hire a baby sitter or took them to daycare.  Then, you have the grandparents forced to work when their social security checks were not enough to pay bills, rent, or even food, and more and more people went to welfare for help.  Then there are the baby sitters and nannies that abused their charges that scared many parents, not to mention the day care scandals.  Those monsters ruined things for good people, who are far and few between.

                        "Then," the television screen turned on to show a psychiatrist talking about his latest book, "You have these so-called professionals telling parents how to raise their children.  Don't discipline them, reward them even when they don't win, always ensure them that they are the best even at their worst.  The old ways are barbaric and raised criminals.  Well honey,  I'll tell you something.  We did not have such a raise in crime until these money-hungry fools showed up selling their books like they were the new bible."

                        "You are damned either way you raise the children basically," Martha concluded, "Punish them and you are an abuser that should be sent to jail.  Let them run wild and you are lazy at parenting.  Society can't make up its mind."

                        "Exactly.  Good parents from the older generations gave up and let their kids do whatever.  These poor kids then believe that the world revolves around them and never learn better.  They then become adults and parents themselves, teaching their kids these things and those kids become no better either.  The parents pay for their diplomas when the kids didn't learn anything in school, blaming the teachers when the kids were in the wrong.  Their kids were told no, and the parents act like the persons saying no told their kids that Santa Claus was killed by the Mafia for owing them protection money or something.  They think a person in a wheelchair or using food stamps are faking their ailments when they themselves are the real liars.  It never ends.

                        "And the worst part of it," the television screen changes to a man screaming at a retail associate that was crying, "Their favorite targets are employees.  They feel that if they make such a fuss, they will get free stuff and they teach their kids this is the best method to do so.  They make people quit and take up panhandling when looking for employment elsewhere is almost impossible to do."

                        "I had heard there are those out there that pretend to be homeless when they're not for free money," Martha pointed out,  "My brother sees them a lot, being dropped off and they stand around with a cardboard sign for a few hours before being picked up again.  The worse ones are those that fake being veterans."

                        "Exactly."

                        "But one can't really say everyone in this generation are like that."

                        "No.  Some are still taught morals and how to treat people right.  It just so happens that there are less and less of them with each generation.  And even if a parent teaches their kids right, doesn't mean that kid would turn out fine.  Sometimes, they act entitled just because they think so and nothing will change them."

                        "How sad for them."

                        "Well, I believe my time here is done," Karen began to disappear, "I wish you the best of luck for your next job."

                        "If I can get it, but thank you.  Also, would you say they are the worse at Christmas time?"
                        "Oh, honey.  No, no, no.  With everyone buying online most of the time, they're like this all year long.  Merry Christmas."

                        "Merry Christmas."

                        Once again alone, Martha looked down at her coffee and decided she didn't need another cup.  Finishing up her lukewarm drink, she went into the kitchen and put the mug into the sink.  She would wash it later.  When she came back into the living room, no one was in her armchair.  Curious, she looked around and found an envelope by the television.  She picked up the envelope and opened it to find a piece of paper inside.  She opened the piece of paper and began to read.

 

                        Dear Martha,

                                    My name is Timmy Dewpie.  I am, or rather was, the Ghost of Christmas Retail Future.  I will not be visiting you tonight because I am out of a job.  To be short, you are right in searching for a new job.  Retail has basically died in the future.  There are no more physical stores for customers to buy from and everyone buys online.  Including groceries.  Yeah, that's how lazy people had become.  The kids are getting an education at home online now.  And they still cheat and cry when they're in the wrong.  Social media is the biggest booming business, yet people are too shy to meet up.  I am starting to wonder how families are still gonna be made.

                        It's not like a ton of people are out of a job, mind you.  Everyone left before the last store closed and the market for online customer service is saturated with people now.  The only people that go out now are delivery drivers and emergency personnel.  Restaurants have shrank to just being a kitchen and a counter.  The online stores have taken over the world.  People's eyes are glued to their televisions, phones, or even computers.  I refused to be the Ghost of Christmas Online Retail Future, so this is my last job.  And I hope that Donna person learns that drinking until you're unconscious isn't good for you, either.

                        Anyway, that is all.  Now all those entitled people you were talking to Karen about are screaming at automatic systems and no one pays attention to them anymore.  It's kinda hilarious that they can be appeased by a free pen or something.  It's not like the market is losing out anymore.

                        I'm gonna sit back and wait until the next world war hits and takes out all the electronics and watch everyone panic.  Those guys living off the grid are going to be laughing their ***** off.  Have a Merry Christmas and check your email on the 26th.

 

         Sincerely,

         Timmy

 

                        With a soft smile on her face, Martha put the letter away and turned off the lights, heading to bed.  She enjoyed her Christmas the following day, and checked her email as the letter said to do.  She had been hired for the data entry clerk job she always wanted.  She was happy with glee and couldn't wait to start.

 

The End

Author's Note

For anyone that has read r/slash entitled parents, r/slash idon'tkworkherelady, or r/slash malicious compliance, that is where I got the idea for this story. I had also worked several types of retail, so I added that in to spice it up.