Shadows

There are 800 dead bodies below the beautiful women's house

She says they are just shadows

Consequences of the sun's rays

Too bright

She says

They create unreal things

That your head creates

She says

I saw her standing on the windowsill

trying to write stories on the complexity of her precious soul, twisting the thorns of the unmaintained reality that crafted miracles for her head

She motioned to me 

And lead me through her basement

Her basement was not spooky at all

The walls were painted bright pink

with little green flowers growing up to the celling

I step over Albert Fisher*

*the man next door, with no proper edict

Over Ashley O'Neil*

*liquid detergent and a superiority complex

Oliver Jameson*

*he couldn't read between the lines or books

And I travel through the high flowers

Following the women 

Through the deep and dark shadows

I can't see her really 

But I hear her say; 

What do your think?

It's alright,

Sort of morbid 

There are minutes of silence

As I step over

Rose Crow*

*too luxurious for life

Robert Russel*

*always on the wrong train to Par-ee

Pamela Johnson*

*if only she didn't wear that smile

I catch up with her

And see she had stopped

because we are at the end

She reaches down her throat

And pulls out a pink knife

I fall down, under green flowers 

and a bright beautiful pink sky

*a proud fool

Reviews

[h d e rushin]

You are learning the gamble of poetry my friend. That only do you bet on (against) the allegory of the poem
(the truths or generalizations about human existence)
but also on the gruel insignificance of it. This is storied and blessed and beautiful like the detrital left
in a running stream. You have obviously done your homework my friend....

well done...dana

[Olivia]

Thank you so much dana

[dan]

Olivia, This piece is so outstanding that I saved it in my library. I've done at least 150 reviews since joining WC and there is only one other poem in there; I don't, in other words, do it very often AT ALL. There is one part that I'm not completely sure about, and that is the listing of names followed by a line of verse? Is this symbolizing the stories this person has written? I can say, however, that even this uncertainty does NOT detract from the brilliance of the write. Your wordplay is so on point (ex. "I saw her standing on the windowsill trying to write stories on the complexity of her precious soul...") that it mesmerized this reader and prevents me from quitting my read (though I did not AT ALL want to), so very compelling. I'm still not feeling 100%, when I do I am coming to your page to read more of your work. If it is as magical as this one you will quickly become one of my favorite poets. take care...

[Olivia]

Yeah I think this poem is okay.
You are very kind

[A Glow in the Pit of My..]

Love the use of the asterisks. Your voice sets you apart from the other mundane words Ive read on here and across the internet as a whole. Not just anything can become a poem.... Some try too hard, but your writing seems effortless and ethereal. Much more my style.

[Olivia]

Thank you for reviewing a lot of my poems. Your reviews are so nice, they make me smile,

[A Glow in the Pit of My Soul]

I mean what I say! And you're welcome, I guess you just remind me a bit of myself when I was a teenager. I truly do enjoy reading them, I'm glad I can make you smile :)