I Am Trying

I am trying

To not fall in love

But with your hands in my hair

And your lips on my skin

I can’t help but feel

My heart lift and take flight

I am trying

To not miss you

At least not too much

But sleeping alone leaves me so cold

And I crave the taste of you

Pressed hard against my lips

I am trying

To keep myself afloat

Just enough to breathe

But when you’re not here I lose my way

And these ocean waves are far too heavy

The emptiness is just too much

I am trying

To let you in

And show what I’m feeling

But when you’re near I lose all words

Expect for three

That leave me desperately gasping

I am trying

To keep myself breathing

And chase away the thought of you

But when I look outside I see you

And everywhere I turn I hear your name

On the tip of every poisoned tongue

I am trying

To find myself out

And know that I’m okay

But every minute is agony

And I can’t remember the way your voice sounds

When you say “I love you”

I am trying

Ever so desperately to not miss you

And not to tell you

But how can I deny this broken heart of mine

When you’re all I think about

And I miss you every goddamn day

I am trying

To grow out of my past

And be the woman you want and need

But how can I when I’m too much

And you’re not enough

Should I even keep trying?

I am trying

To not fall out of love

And to remember why I liked how you sound

But it's been so long now

And the blue of your eyes is faded from my mind

And I can breathe, even though you’re gone

Reviews

[Pluto]

Lovely poem! Keep writing!

[Oliveonyouroil]

Thank you so much!