Final Words

Final Words

A Poem by Meghan
"

This was in response to the prompt, "What would your final words be?"

"

We are beasts

in this naturalized,

hyperbolized

polis;

 

an ungodly waste

of human capacity.

 

We entertain,

we smack our lips

on the culturally sterile.

 

I am a goddess

of my soul’s wit,

devoid of personality.

 

I’ve a plot reserved--

a place in Paradise

 

where silence

is the new ignorance.

© 2012 Meghan


Author's Note

Meghan
Are my ideas coming across clearly?

My Review

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Featured Review

I think your view on the dysfunction and breakdown of our societal responsibilities when it comes to complacency and respect is well-received. Personal heroes are our own souls these days, and unless something interrupts or intercepts that false cover of safety, they all react with a curious fervor that is unfamiliar in these new times!! What a smart and introspective piece that examines the world around and our place in this "new" age of sorts. Who am I to say, though. lol I never even graduated High school. I just soak up stuff and take notice of how the world reacts to itself!! : ) I told a friend on here, a while back, if something could see us from space....... we would look like a bunch of angry bacteria chomping on a Blueberry. : ) xoxo -Mark

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Meghan

11 Years Ago

Thank you very much! You really understood what I was hoping to portray :D



Reviews

I think your view on the dysfunction and breakdown of our societal responsibilities when it comes to complacency and respect is well-received. Personal heroes are our own souls these days, and unless something interrupts or intercepts that false cover of safety, they all react with a curious fervor that is unfamiliar in these new times!! What a smart and introspective piece that examines the world around and our place in this "new" age of sorts. Who am I to say, though. lol I never even graduated High school. I just soak up stuff and take notice of how the world reacts to itself!! : ) I told a friend on here, a while back, if something could see us from space....... we would look like a bunch of angry bacteria chomping on a Blueberry. : ) xoxo -Mark

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Meghan

11 Years Ago

Thank you very much! You really understood what I was hoping to portray :D
Wow such strength in words, & deepness.
I found this to be intriguing.
Fancinating last four lines.
Awesome write.

Posted 12 Years Ago


I suggest that you change "silence" to "bliss." It reads smoother and both words are tied together so closely that their practically interchangeable in this poem.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Nice vocab and I think your presentation is fine. Well done.

Posted 12 Years Ago


No, your ideas aren't coming across clearly. But that's alright- I enjoyed it anyway. It still conjured images in my mind, so in that regard, you've succeeded.

When I first read the word "polis", I had to look it up. At first, I thought you meant "police", because I just read "Filth" by Irvine Welsh (a Scot), and he uses "polis" as a phonetic translation of the word "police".

Posted 12 Years Ago


good flow, outstanding vocabulary!

Posted 12 Years Ago


awesome write loved every minute of it:)

Posted 12 Years Ago


I like what you have to say here. Nice thoughts

Posted 12 Years Ago



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13 Reviews
Rating
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Added on April 10, 2012
Last Updated on April 18, 2012
Tags: society, humanity, death

Author

Meghan
Meghan

About
I've been a student of film and fashion design, dabbled in creative writing, fine art, philosophy, and psychology, but am currently between universities. I will always be a patron of anything artistic.. more..

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