Unrequited Words

Live in the moment, let go of the past. Feel the stars upon your cheeks, taste the tears while they last. Hear the clock in the distance, absorb the moment, and forget everything remote

Subtle
Subliminal
Intact and yet imperfect,
A scene is sewn in forgiving light.
Dancing with Fern, with Apollo and his grace -
It reaps no concrete burden,
It weeps no steel;
But unfolds as secret hope
As unrequited words;
That whispered between pages.

Concealed kisses caress the air,
And rest above a heather blanket
To burn in scarlet, to lie in crimson -
Becoming oil on water.
Frost decays on its bed of flames;
A spine torn apart,
Crushed humbly upon yours
In a utopian cradle.

For now,
Forget crossword auras that spark dampened bridges -
Ethereal airs
Of elusive glares that bruised jade stems,
To anywhere.

Condemning unrequited winds -
Too raw to thrive
Too real to drive a haunting of broken ashes -
Paints skies of hollow arms
That tick
Without translucent tones of clocks unkept
For honest eyes

Reviews

[Kyle Sky]

undoubtedly a beautifully versed poem. The imagery was wonderful, as well as the atmosphere. somehow, I imagined a glistering white cloud surrounded by the burning rays of the sun when reading this... anyways, Your verses flowed graciously and your choice of words for the verses was quite creative.

On your theme and message: Beautiful, simple and very attractive. The idea of words of love not being returned as if it was only meant for flattery and pleasure instead of true feeling is lovely. The way you presented it made it more attractive. Well, that is how I interpreted it.

All the same, This is truly a Simple yet attractive piece. Wonderful Job.

[Ohhhwillow]

This was in fact based on the notion of acceptance, and contemptment. Of embracing every moment as it appears as opposed to looking forward or back. Although as always everyone makes their own interpretations which is fine! :) Thank you very much for your detailed review Kyle, always a pleasure to hear from you!

[I Shred This Cabbage]

Oh wondrous mechanics of the universe, how did your mathematics and biologies dream up such a creature all stardust and poetry :) as always, I am stunned by the eloquence and melancholy of your words :)

[Ohhhwillow]

I read this review to my friend, all cheery and proud. :) Thank you for giving me your lovely response!

[I Shred This Cabbage]

You continue to impress, so I press you to continue :) X

[beautiful dreamer]

beautifully penned willow beautifully penned. Great imagery could see every bit of it just behind my eyes. accepting what has been done and accepting the present is something i struggle with sometimes. i think most do, very well done.

[Trace]

incredible poem. I love the last verse best. Thanks for sharing. Trace

[Ohhhwillow]

Thank you Trace, I'm glad you enjoyed this piece. Feel free to be as critical as you like!

[marie]

amazing write:) you are an amazing writer:) can't wait to catch up on your works:)

[Ohhhwillow]

Thank you Marie, I really need to get back to writing - I have been rather distant from it for a while!

[PANTHER811]

Was intrigued by your review of Cody's writing, "the reader can never recieve enough visual aid", so here I am. Expectations met Willow, your imagery was stunning. From "Intact and yet imperfect" to " Ethereal airs", extrapolations and metaphors for who think. Thank you for this exception write. Enjoyed very much, Tom

[Ohhhwillow]

Thank you for your kind review Tom! I'm glad that I satisfied your need for imagery, as I too am intrigued by the prospect pf wonderful pictures, painted with words! If you wish for me to read something of yours then inbox me a poem - my RR box is flooded! :(

[SquinklaPsyOps]

Brilliant, let the spirit ride to its destination.

[Ohhhwillow]

Exactly, the soul will find its place; what's for it, will not go past it

[Ohhhwillow]

Thank you for reading! :)

[Cody Williams]

Great write! Thanks for sharing!

-CW

[pasdepoisson]

I have always been fond of alliteration (a bit too fond), and I love the subtle (subliminal), symphonic use of consonants in lines like "Concealed caresses kiss the air"... which line is also exemplary of the rhythm and music of your lines.

The mind's tongue has a lot to wrap around here, with delicious lines like "Ethereal airs/Of elusive glares(...)"

Some really haunting images here as well, as best embodied here for me as "Without translucent tones of clocks unkept".

Beautiful work!

[Ohhhwillow]

Thank you friend for your detailed review! I am yet to read a review in which I have been quoted back in, and not blush. I definitely would agree that my lines can often me rhythmically and literarily heavy - perhaps even overbearing - however I am happy to hear that it may sometimes work in my favour. Leave me an inbox with a poem of yours in it and I will review it anytime! Sorry, my red request box is swamped!

[Luke Rawlings]

I don't go on Writer's Cafe for a while and when I return, I get to read magic like this that inspires me once again. I'd say this is one of your best. Absolutely amazing. *fireworks*

[Ohhhwillow]

Thank you Luke! I am ever humbled by your reviews, it is you lot that often keep me going when I'm not too sure. Inbox me a poem of yours to review if you would like seem feedback, I'm always happy to help, and my read request box is just too swarming to choose from!