Little Bird

12/1/13 One person can save you from the world, unfortunately, only you can save you from yourself and others lose faith when you lose control. No matter how much you love.

My feathers fall and turn to dust,
My wings burst into perfect wine -
Set alight by this darting tongue,
The brightest roaring flame of mine
That dwindles with your kiss
As magenta does at dawn.

The sparrow in vivacious winter collects brittle branches,
As I plead for yours,
With doubt by futile winds that shook them long ago,
I know,
The persistent hold resistant hope -
Frost is now composing
On the bedding for my hollow nest.

What a solemn place to rest
Little bird,
Beyond the dreams of flightless facades
That burn and yearn
To see afar,
To their crystal castles.
Mine is built with the debris of a sublime dream
The nestling place you leave for me to last a long forever.

Reviews

[pasdepoisson]

I think there's a bit here for every part of the poetic spectrum:

The lyrical side of me loves:
That dwindles with your kiss
As magenta does at dawn.

The bitter side:
Frost is now composing
On the bedding for my hollow nest.

Clever to compose so persuasive a piece for any persuasion.

[Ohhhwillow]

I like to pull in complex and contrasting emotions - in reality this is how we feel at most times, so why condense merely one feeling to a piece? That is my thinking. Anyway, thank you for reading and I'm glad you enjoyed this!

[Tarry Franck]

Spectacular poem :)

[.]

it's nice fella........
i liked ur's starting.......

[MandaBear]

an incredibly beautiful write

[C.C. Marx]

The imagery is phenomenal as well as the metaphors used here, and its true that only you can save yourself, if you can't its safe to say no one can. Beautifully done

[Ohhhwillow]

And if you can't accept yourself, others will struggle to! In the end, it comes down to fighting for yourself. Thank you again! :)

[C.C. Marx]

My pleasure again!!

[asdarkeyesclose]

'The sparrow in vivacious winter collect brittle branches,'

an incredibly beautiful write, moving, heart-felt, i loved the flow and choice of image. fantastic.

[Ohhhwillow]

Thank you, I'm glad you were able to make a connection with this piece! Send me a read request anytime! :)

[The Invisible Girl]

This is written so beautifully! I love all the imagery. It makes me stop and think. :)
An amazing poem! Can't wait to read more! :) 100/100

-Invisible Girl! :)

[Ohhhwillow]

Thank you very much, please feel free to send me as many read requests as you like! :) x

[The Invisible Girl]

You're very welcome! :)

[Horizon K.]

This is one I have to let sit with me and mull over. The visions you inspire here of a little bird desperate to build a nest with love and hope, denied until the dream freezes over. Quite lovely. Btw, is solum spelt wrong? Should be solemn.

[Ohhhwillow]

That was what I was going for, I guess we can all feel like a little bird out in the cold sometimes! Oops! Thank you! :)

[Ohhhwillow]

You write so beautifully, and full with care and compassion,
This is beautiful poetry, and I'm glad I came here to read.
You're very talented for someone of your age, and your writes
are very deep. Keep on writing, like you do, dear friend.

I"m already a fan!

- Elisa

[Ohhhwillow]

I'm glad to give you a good first impression Elisa, thank you for your time and I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[Emberlorna]

A beautiful and enchanting piece. Just amazing.. I love it :)

[Ohhhwillow]

Thanks! :)