blades

a true story....a longer work, but true.

she stands.

broken and bleeding.

blood running down her extremities. 

her heart slowing down...

after that initial moment of pain

her skin grows cold

her head spins once the blood pools

and then she grows warm...

chills run up and down her spine

finally relaxing at the base of her skull.

emotions run out with the drops of blood.

she can now relax, she can breathe now. 

it starts in her fingers and toes,

it moves up her arms and legs...

it reaches her chest and her face...

she is finally numb.

she sees the clock and realizes its time to pretend again.

presses a damp cloth to the wounds,

the initial sting, reminds her that pain helps her deal

she deserves it.

the bleeding stops and she pulls clothing over the cuts and comes down the stairs.

food is forced down, conversation is faked, smiles are plastered on. 

"I had a big lunch"

"I have allot of homework"

"I'm tired, it was a long day"

climbing the stairs

pain starts to settle in.

wounds start to hurt and swell.

fabric is carefully peeled off,

sticking into cuts.

she lays in bed.

she falls asleep, from being so exhausted. 

to many emotions

to many fears

to many thoughts.

suddenly, its bright.

she opens her eyes and is surrounded by light. 

she sees nothing but brightness

so much so that she almost cannot open her eyes. 

no fear

no pain

just light.

she looks around and suddenly hears a voice all around her.

"my child, can you not see what you mean to me?

can you not tell that you are loved and surrounded by people who want nothing but the best for you?

you are loved,

you are light.

you are beautiful 

and embraced

you will never be forgotten

you will never be forsaken

you will always be wrapped in light

and the darkness shall flee from your presence

you will lead others

you will be the shinning light. 

shine your brightest

even in the darkest night.

your light is my light

my body is my body

everything you see, hear and touch...

has come from me. 

but it has been there to be an inspiration to you."

her head spun,

where was this voice?

why was she not afraid?

"Inspiration for what?"

she asked.

"Inspiration for you to live, for you to strive to be someone on this earth.

someone to lead others, to be strong and to fight.

to fight for those with no voice, to fight for those to weak or to broken to do so themselves.

to fight not only for others....but for yourself as well my dear. 

so go out there, realize that you are NOT your mistakes, your past may stay there, but do not let your story die out. let your life be a story for others to live by and others to be inspired by. just as you have been inspired by my creations."

Suddenly all breath was taken out of her lungs, 

she fell to her knees in awe

everything went dark.

but only just a second later, 

she awoke one more time.

lying in bed.

moving over and taking off the covers...

she saw the blood stains from her open wounds.

but when she arose from her bed...

there was no stabbing pain on her body.

no sting from cool air,

no pain from the fresh cuts.

she looked

she saw nothing.

she searched and she searched,

naked in front of a mirror....

Nothing.

they were gone.

both new and old.

for the first time in years...

she went to the shower

and walked past the blade 

lying on her desk

and never thought again about picking it up.

even when she walked in darkness

light always shone

people followed

people questioned.

but here she walks,

head high

scar free

and life embraced. 

Author's Note

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