Ocean Dream

The pain erupts

In a sea of flesh

Hidden beneath my azure depths

All the lies that mesh

To reveal more than death

That keeps me entangled

More than it seems

And I long to be free

To explore my Ocean Dream

I keep myself away

From the pain

I cannot gainsay

All I do

Is dream of the day

That I can swim away

To find the peace

Promised to me

In my Ocean Dream

I cannot remember

Before the hurt

Before the burn

That lurks

Beneath my concious state

I take it with me wherever I go

And only in my dreams

My blissful, sweet dreams

Am I free

To roam

In my Ocean Dream

Reviews

[Daleth Grey]

i like the irregular rhythm here, it really reinforces the mood. not to mention i love the piece as a whole- it reminds me of the times i think i'm better off asleep than awake. the rhyming pattern (or maybe lack thereof) works really well. great piece :)

[Vincent Weathers]

This poem has good visuals, and also an interesting pattern. I like how that each line is connected to each other. I also find the imagery to be interesting, the cool blue colors and the darkened hazes. It sort of reminds me of the turtle in his shell sort of idea. You've done well.