Farewell

Uncertain if there will be another

 

Feeling scattered, in an aimless abyss

   comfort delved only, as we reminisce

Mutual memories to hold wavered steps

   dreamt desire to guide cadenced depths

 

As we struggle through this labyrinth apart

   I’ll hold you, as a whisper, in my heart

Yet somehow I can’t constrain this grieving

   it tears me up, the thought of you leaving

 

Ardent affection, miasma for your soul

   but wounded lips long withered waned control

Could you forgive my words’ caressing pain?

   nigh night’s eclipse, I wish ne’er to restrain

 

Will heartfelt kisses bring lasting “Au revoir”

   your light returning as the morning star?

Or will “farewell” be our final “adieu”,

   never confessing, I’ve come to love you?

 

Author's Note

Just a basic pentameter sonnet.

Reviews

[Blue]

Nusquam! Though this is a sad poem, I was all smiles while reading it. Not because it's not good as being a sad poem, but because after having read your previous ones (which are far from the category of romance), I find this romantic side of you so adorable. *still smiling*

Sorry, I don't have anything intellectual to say. After a long time of not being here, my critical self is not at its fullest potential, not even at its normal level. Ha. But really, I enjoyed the read!

[Alisa Js]

Aloha,

Well, one thing is for certain and it is this. You are quite talented across the spectrum of styles and form. I have many of your pieces and without question, you have a gift.

One question I do have, though. Do you speak Japanese?

Curious,

Alisa💫

[Mister_Sir]

This is a beautiful piece, Esse. While I am a strong proponent of sorrowful and tragic prose and poetry, I would like to give my strong condolences to you in regards to the drifting between you and your girlfriend.
I immediately recognized the style, partly because it reminded me so much of Shakespeare. This is one of the reasons why this poem drew me in so quickly. And, as usual, in both form and subject you have communicated a great authority and passion.
My favorite parts of this piece are the first two lines of the second and third stanzas. "[W] hisper, in my heart" and "miasma for your soul" are the best descriptions here in my opinion. Bravo for every word of this piece, and I sincerely wish you all the best in relation to your girlfriend.

Neurotically yours,
Mister Splitbrain

[jacob erin-cilberto]

but not basic in effect...a really strong and sad love poem...

and later we regret so much that we never said those words, once the other is gone.

nice work here, nusquam..

jacob

[Nusquam Esse]

Thanks for reading Jacob, I know you are not one for formed poetry, so the gesture is appreciated. Obviously I am still pondering how things will go; but hopefully there can be some form of conclusion reached in the near future. I have stood by in the past, so this time I have been trying to be upfront and not be so reserved on matters of the heart. But admittedly it leaves you vulnerable

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, vulnerable...and i am not just paying lip service...i seldom write form...but when i read someone who does it well and it sounds natural...i am engaged.

this one made me feel that.

[Kuandio]

The first stanza was amazing, especially the three last lines.

It seems like this is more in line with the classic art of poetry. There is a meter, I think, and use of rhyme, which creates a rhythm to it

I did think maybe the second stanza was kind of cliche. The third stanza good, but a little convoluted the first time I read it

(Well, I hope this poem doesn't mean you broke up with your girlfriend though)

[Nusquam Esse]

Yep, you are correct, it has a meter. Iambic Pentameter mostly, although I do occasionally deviate from Iambs depending on the line. I admittedly have a soft spot for classical poetry, since people just don't express themselves that way much anymore. Thanks for reading, and no, not breaking up... just drifting apart. Lots of indecision of how long it will be.