Once a Red Moon

“Hurry, we’re going to miss it!” 

Why does she have to always nag?  I’m hurrying as fast as I can…  Besides, I would rather spend the night alone, dreaming--I prefer those memories.  But I know better than to resist; she’s just one of those people who catches everyone else up in their pace.  I dislike that about her.

“Relax, we have plenty of time.  It’s not like it’ll be over that quickly.” I assure her.

“I’m not going to relax.  You know how long it has been since we last had this chance, and I want to watch it start this time.  So stop dragging your feet, and get your suit on.” she replies in exasperation.

With a sigh, I begin to meekly put on my suit.  I loath the suit; it always makes me feel closed in, as if I’m trapped within a room which ends a mere inch from my nose.  But if we are going to go outside, I have little choice.  I never know how to say no, so I just stubbornly drag it out as long as I can; it is the only way I can show that while I am going along, I’m not doing so willingly.

She already has her suit on, and with a smile from behind her faceplate, she places her gloved hand on mine.  It’s pointless, I can’t feel anything through this suit, but even so, the gesture assures me.  'I will be okay, it’s just a suit… just a suit.' 

She reassures me, “You have done this hundreds of times.  This won’t be any different, just another walk on the surface.  And besides,” she pauses for a moment and gripping me tightly, she whispers, “You aren’t alone.”

I smile back, a frail twitch of the lips, but a smile all the same.  With just a moment of hesitation, we depressurize the chamber.  After a moment of awkward silence, the door slowly opens; now there is that complete silence which you could never hear back home.  I feel that familiar sense of panic, as if, despite the massive white plain which spreads out before us, the whole black sky is trying to crush me, stifle me, closing in closer than even that faceplate which hovers an inch from my nose.  I know it’s just emptiness, but it doesn’t feel that way.  It’s lame--an astronaut like me, with a phobia like this--but suit malfunctions are not a simple thing to recover from.  A single time with your oxygen depleted, and a suit is never the same--few things are...

She grabs my shoulder, and I hear her familiar voice through my radio, “Come on, you’ll be fine.  It will be worth it.   It is not every day that we get to see home.”

I merely nod, I can handle this much; it always fades after a few minutes.  Still, I know better than to speak right now; to voice how it could never be worth it; complaints will have to wait until I can speak without vomiting.

We make our way out over the edge of the dark sea.  It is an odd place, with such thin air and deceptive landscapes, you don’t have depth perception; who knows how far anything is.  Home seems so near, yet so far… I really miss home.  This is why I didn’t want to do this.

The bleached landscape has already begun to change, looking up, I can see that familiar dark blob making its way across the Sun; it is beginning.  We barely reach the vista before the rocks around us turn a rusted brown, like the color of old blood.  And not just the rocks, but us as well; it is odd to see her in that color.

She grabs my arm, “Come on; sit.  We are going to be here for a while, so let’s enjoy it.”  And then she doesn’t just sit, she sprawls, propped up against a large rock.  I will never get used to this color.  I still remember as a kid looking up here, and wondering why it looked like blood.  But it is quite different to actually be here, it’s just a macabre nightmare now.  It grows dark quickly, until we can no longer see the Sun, it is obscured.  To me it is an ill omen.

She joyfully exhales, “I really enjoy the eclipses here; they are so mysterious.  So very different than home.  They are more… unique, dark… complete.”

I grunt.  I have told her time and time again that I am no fan of this rusted color or, for that matter, this place at all.  But she is always telling me that we must make the best of what we have, I wish she wouldn’t try so hard...

“Look!  We can finally see it!”  And sure enough, she is right; with the sun hidden and, except for an eerie red light around the edges, the Earth’s a pitch black which we never see any other time.  It’s only in this darkness that our home, or what was once our home, reveals itself.

With a sigh of disappointment she groans, “It’s the Pacific Rim, again.”

I reassure her, “Does it matter?  It’s earth, isn’t it?”

She smiles softly, before replying, “I know, but Tokyo doesn’t mean anything to me except stories of Samurai and Geisha, it feels so distant.  It’s just… it has just been so long since I last saw the lights of Boston…  Guess we only get that lucky once in a blue moon…?”

With a chuckle I can’t help but retort, “More like once a red moon; only the Earth is blue.”  It is a bit sarcastic, but it the closest I get to be being lighthearted.  I have always been this way I suppose, long before I met her--cynical.

She smiles, this time a full on grin, “Yeah, we see home all the time like that, but it’s just not the same.  Only with the lights from the cities does it really convey... a human presence.”

I can only nod.  I sort of understand what she means, even though I wish I didn’t.  There is something surreal about seeing the night sky, as if it carries some ancestral memory.  I dislike nostalgia.

She is going off into one of her fantasies again, it is both endearing and irritating for me… it has been a long time since I was able to dream like her; but I prefer it this way, because eventually we need to wake up. 

With awe in her voice, she looks up at the sky, at the millions of stars which we had never seen at home in Boston, “As a child I looked up at the stars, and I wondered… is there someone else out there?  Someone else looking at those same stars?  Perhaps someone on one of those stars?  That is why… when I see those night lights I wonder the same thing… the same thing about home.  Is there someone… some…?”  She fades off, as if she doesn’t know how to continue.

I hate this part of me, but it’s who I am.  With a sarcastic laugh I can’t help but crush her, to destroy her, “Life up in the stars?  Do you really think that just because there is light, there is someone else out there?  You know the truth…”  And with my voice choking, because in the end, I can’t but help crush myself, I finally spit out those envenomed words which have been trapped in me for years, always on the tip of my tongue but never spoken, “All those lights down there on Earth, they are just that, Lights!  Just empty cities.  There is no one up there, no one down there; we are alone!  We are all that’s left, and it’s only a matter of time…”  And I can’t help but sob at this, just as I can’t finish the last part, I hate how hysterical I get.  I used to be more composed; but I guess that one part of me has changed.  I don’t know when...

Suddenly her hand is in mine, squeezing.  I can’t feel her warmth, but still there is something reassuring in it.  She grimly concedes, “I know…  I know.”  And then as if the whole world could be righted from this one fact alone she added, “But we have each other.” 

 

And that is why I hate her.

Reviews

[Moonie]

This reminded me of the beginning chapter of "A casual vacancy" in the first few paragraphs. I imagined that they were perhaps a couple stuck in a loveless marriage. The reality blew me away (I did have my suspicions, since it is your story)
I love the fact that you kept so much out, open for the reader's imagination. Most people are unable to do that.
For me, that is cowardice. In my poems, there are always surfaces of meanings. The outer most being yhe visual aspect, which I explain to precision, the next would be the underlying surface which is for the reader to interpret. What I gather from this is the effects of war. Not just old school world war, but any kind of discord.
So long as there are conflicting ideals, there would be war. So long as there are clashing personalities, there would be war. Basically, so long as there is humanity, there would be war, even though the humanity is just 2 people. Also, very, very clever use of present tense. It gives the feel as though, these 2 are actually watching us right now.
I like how you surprise me by saying " de pressurise the chamber" . That is the phrase that turned it around.
My suggestions would be:


#1 I thought it had nothing to do with space and was just a small argument between the couple in the beginning. My complain then, was that it does not describe the surroundings that much, and so I became suspicious. Try saying that the narrator looked at the white coloured walls around him, and the dull source of lighting in the middle of the ceiling or something like that.
#2para 5
The last line confuses me a bit. Does the narrator put on the suit to show that he is discontent, and there is a history associated with that particular suit, or does he put it on with a look of discontentment to show that he is against wearing that suit. Pay attention to how you framed it.
#3sixth paragraph, try "gloved hand in mine" not "on"
#4 paragraph 10
Try, "when you don’t have depth perception, who knows how far...."
#5 13th paragraph
try, "so very different from home" instead of "than"
also, try "to being lightheaded". I think you wrote the "be" by mistake.
"Long before I met her" disturbs the flow of him being "this way--cynical". Put it in brackets.
#7 in the 2nd last paragraph
Try, "but I guess that one part of me changed, I don't know when...." cut "has"
Also, it seems tiny but change "I can't but help crush myself" to " I can't help but crush myself"
#8 last paragraph
try "hand on (or around)mine"
also, you wrote added instead of adds, which disrupted the tense.

In the end, this is your story, and the end decision is yours entirely. Hope my review helps.:))

[Pax]

wow, oddly i was not expecting it to be sci-fi or something to be in apocalyptic era. I was thinking about how such a loner the speaker is, and the this girl somehow an imagination or the voices in the head. I was great my friend, I was totally hook from first till the ending.

You know, I admire the this girl in the story, the way she lifts up the soul of her only companion. Dreaming, day dreaming of place once was... Her positive aura in everything simply rubs off on your readers. The glow she keep inside, to keep on living, not only for her but to him as well. And also how she understand everything about him. No matter how he pushes her or ignores her, he will always gives in to her. and No matter how he hates her in words, but deep inside his loves for her is far greater than how much as he hates her...

it is simply a great short story, i truly enjoyed it.

[ZeniaK]

The ending was amazing!!!! Saying, "And that is why I hate her." was great!! The last three paragraphs were my favorite, because I think they showed the most depth. I love how different both of your characters are, too, and that you were able to characterize them in a relatively short story (which can be difficult to do). Awesome job! I enjoyed reading this a lot.