死出の旅 (A Final Journey)

Senryu in Japanese (with Translation)

Shide no Tabi

Mugendou
Mubouna Seigi
Nama no Oto

A Final Journey Into Death

The Infinite Path
A Reckless and Rash Justice
Life's Raw Resonance

(I had to take some liberty on the translation to make it conform to the western haiku syllable structure, while trying to hold onto nuances)

Author's Note

I decided that since I actually do know Japanese, that I should write an authentic styled haiku/senryu. Seasons have never really been my thing, so I decided to write a Senryu. The piece is in Japanese, and follows the traditional 5/7/5 on format (On is different than syllables, as this piece has 4/5/5 syllables; feel free to look up the difference. The point is, authentic Senryu are not based upon syllables) Forgive how poor my translations are; it is difficult to carry the same nuances when translating.

Reviews

[Fran Marie]

' For whom the bell tolls`~ love the life's raw resonance part especially ...

beautiful work all the way around..

[Zahra]

very nice -enjoyed your amazing senryu

[Einstein Noodle]

i admire your fine mind sir ... if for nothing else ..you know Japanese!! on top of that you do a great job packing depth, wisdom and a bit of cynicism into this marvelous piece.. as a society in USA we talk way too little of death and dying ... its as you say " The Infinite Path" ... one and the same as the joy of birth says i .. not that one wants to go before the time .. enjoyed this little (haiku/senryu) very much ..
E.

[Blue]

Nusquam, you are awesome! I'm even more afraid to try haiku/senryu because I can never be as good as you. You just blew me away. QWERTYUIOPASDFGHJKLZXCVBNM!!!!!!!!!!!! Love love love this a lot!

Keep posting haikus/senryus, please? :)

[Frieda P]

Wow a real authentic Haiku, how clever of you, love the way it looks on your page, wish I knew the language, kudos.

[Rod Dangers]

Really like this, and love the pronounciation and traditional spellings. I do enjoy this form massively and you seem to have it licked :D

[Gedalya]

You should try the Terza Rima, it's my favorite, and yet the most complicated. 3 line stanzas with 11 syllables in each, with the last word being the rhyme.

[Gedalya]

The first line & third rhyme, while the second rhymes with the second line of stanza 2 and so on.

[Raymond Federle]

I find it EXTREMELY difficult to write in a different language. Things just somehow never translate from English into anything at all in a good way.

[Gedalya]

You mean like Hebrew & Latin? Because, then I'll certainly agree! lol

[Raymond Federle]

Lingua est sicut anima et vinum. :)

[Gedalya]

I wrote a whole book in Latin, with illustrations once, until I realized that I was mimicking Da Vinci. So, I went on to write with my own language, it turned out that the Voynich Manuscript beat me there too. lol I think the former was titled: Nuova vita Apostata. LoL Reading old scripts in their native tongue is much better than transliterations. Except, I can't read the original Greek or Arabic. Shame. . .

[Gedalya]

I've tried picking up Basque, but it's like learning the programming language brainf***. lol

[Nusquam Esse]

I am pretty sure that programming language was used to code Windows ME... that was fun in Beta... :D

[Gedalya]

LoL, Malborge is another one that gives me a headache. Yet, it was used to make Dante's Inferno.

[Bluefire]

This has to be my favorite, if not that one of my favorite, haiku's of all time.
So "Mugen" means "Endless" right?
Anyway, well done!

[Nusquam Esse]

Mugen, as a literal translation means, 'Without Limits/Bounds', it can mean something which is endless, something infinite, or simply something which is unrestrained. Endless is probably the most common translation for it. I am glad you enjoyed it!

[Bluefire]

Amazing! And thanks for posting! =3

[Shaquana Adams]

Dark and relentless. Cool senryu. :)