As the Phoenix Flies

A narrative poem in Iambic Pentameter. My attempt at Sci-Fi Poetry from a humanistic perspective.

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Deserted by dreams of heaven’s azure,
I awaken alone in distant land.
Isolated in sterile vaulted amber.
Tempestuous hell I can’t understand.


Pallid eidôlon shuffling en masse,
Chthonic ichor corrupts men enthralled.
Shredding through effervescent titian gas,
Amaranthine holocaust furor squalls!


What's my purpose here, in nebulous hell?
Diffidence lingers; obscuring my mind.
Descending to subdued tapestry’s pastel,
Join a cortege for resigned mankind.


Each masked, so empty, expression devoid;
Deadened feet to molten cadence low.
A macabre nightmare contorted by Freud.
Forcibly assimilating their flow.


Such beauty in this human condition,
Majestic fury in Hades untamed.
Within me stirs artistic ambition,
Hidden raw zenith to be reclaimed.


No canvas to adorn with this rapture,
But this ephemeral sulphuric mud.
And no brush my bursting heart to capture,
Except the trickle of my fading blood.


To intimate animus I am bound,
Desperation forging my impression,
Pouring with frenzied heartbeat to the ground.
An artist devout to every passion.

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Crimson erupts forth, clouding my vision.
Oozing life-blood, defiling final art.
So abruptly filled with my derision;
Engrossed with vile conflict of the heart.


My dying mind vows to engrave this moment,
Etching it forever, within my soul.
But my breath never crosses the firmament.
Enslaved forever to that console.

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Deserted by dreams of heaven’s azure,
I awaken alone in distant land.
Isolated in frigid vaulted amber.
Roused by brumal ardor, as if by command.


Through distant glass, an image holds me fast.
Across asperous ice clawing the night.
Jove, such sweet love, holds me captive at last.
Surreally binding me to final endzeit.


Cruel ice twisted heaven-bound with malice.
Riotous myriad of vivid maelstrom ablaze.
Transcendence itself pours from Jove’s chalice.
Haunted by perfection; trapped in its gaze.


A culmination of perpetual bliss
Passion for sentiments immaterial
Eternally consigned to reminisce.
I must preserve this mirage æthereal!


A room filled with canvas unending.
Unsure as to why, I never question.
I’ll submit to my purpose unbending.
Giving completely to my expression.

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This is man's eternally paid penance,
For trespassing on the domain of god.
Submit ourselves to omnipresence.
Forsaking souls for life steeped in fraud.
So must man pay for his hubristic claim,
Nevermore a Phoenix reborn in flame.

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Author's Note

The basic premise of this narrative takes place first on Io and then on Europa (two of Jupiter's moons). I didn't elaborate much, but the man is basically a stored persona in a computer database of sorts, which is printed out. This is why each time he awakens more or less from the same dream. I decided to keep the premise a bit enigmatic; the mystery feels more full than any details I could iron out in a narrative poem. Furthermore, I did intend this to be allegorical, so let your mind go wild. I decided to express the 'thoughts' of the console through binary (although I doubt a computer in this time era would be using binary systems), if nothing else I thought it provided an interesting contrast to the 'poetic thought of the artist. For the sake of 'poetry', and aesthetic form, I decided to express all the computer's thoughts in 5 character intervals. All in all, this is not a conventional poem, and I realize that it is not an 'easy' read, but I wanted to try my hand at writing science fiction poetry with meaning; and this is what I got!


The painting was done by yours truly. I am planning on doing a second one (depicting Io/the first scene), but who knows when I will get around to it.

Reviews

[Tai Ryens]

Your technique is quite enthralling (albeit fairly intimidating, at times, to be frank) and very exquisite and intriguing in many ways. It took me quite a few reads to fully comprehend the meaning of your poem (which was absolutely wrong, but I shall state it anyways) and interpreted it as such, taken aback by the devastation and beauty you portray the end of the world as. The arrogance of humanity is quite apparent and the destruction of it is portrayed more like retribution, rather than revenge; the way you portray humanity makes it sound like they are in dire need of karmic punishment, and the nuclear destruction of the species is a godsend. Your speaker, having witnessed the end of humanity's reign, finally meets death and meets Jupiter, the god of gods, pertaining to some afterlife within which your speaker goes to after death.

Lastly, the ending was cryptic— Humanity, finally having mastered the ways of nature and manipulating all the laws set forth by the universe, put to an end by its own hand due to its inability to control its destruction. A phoenix that has died and never will rise again. Well done.

[Radad Ibn Nasir]

YES, I'm there and every space is filled precisely!

[Adreamer's Bluejay]

Amazing piece. Completely amazing.

[Mark]

I first read this about a month ago? (trying to get better at leaving review) but like I said, this is one of my favourite poems of yours, loved it on first read, the imagery, flow and how your word choice dictated emphases, I saw the binary and knew it wasn't cosmetic, so decoded it for the 2nd read… it blew me away, gave it so much more depth in those layers.. dream logic art… the conflictions constant contrast, the redefining of ego

I don't think it would have grabbed me without the computers voice and the two last lines

Nevermore a Phoenix reborn in flame

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Left in code out of respect;)

[Nusquam Esse]

As I mentioned, it was a tough write... all the nuances and subtle word play took me a lot of time to tweak to my liking. Sci-fi narrative poetry is uncommon, and I was trying to do something uncommon. I originally wrote the computer's segments with plain, simplistic English; but it just didn't seem to work. While binary is unlikely in a sci-fi setting, it seemed a good choice to show the stark contrast between the poet enslaved to a machine and his own contrived purpose. That final bit from the computer was pretty much just a joke... :P

[Mark]

really? lol
I took it as directed at the reader, why do you think I left it in code :p

and yea, i got the premise of the poems storey (its called 'authors notes';) was reading the second layer, where the computer is a part of us.. still laughing;)
so you may still surprise us hey? maybe not a dragon or a chicken either? So Nusquam Esse… are you saying that you exist nowhere? Or you are nothing?

Sorry ;) I look at everything, but don’t stress, I undertake naught but my own enjoyment in the understanding (of the poet and of myself through interpretation ;)

[AprilRN1210]

In each one of your pieces I read, I am constantly amazed by your use of language and your choice of wording... This one has an old world fantasy feel to it. To be honest, the code lost me. I love the choice of font. I love the sense of awakening I get here, where it feels as if seeking answers, questioning what is real and what is an illusion-- highlighting such start contrasts as heavenly beauty and hellish gruesomeness. The imagery is divine and twisted at the same time. Even the emotions it draws out are contrasted which is deliciously disturbing.. The subtle rhymes are very pleasing to the senses as well. I admit it was a little odd to me with the code, the flow felt a little off. But after rereading it a few times, the more I read, the more I saw, and the more I saw, the more I wanted to see, and the more I wanted, the more I really enjoyed... very nice... I will say it is definitely different, but your imagery and use of language alone are exquisite and add to that, the thought-provoking stimulation, and the contrasting emotions-- it is superb.

[Nusquam Esse]

I used the code because I was trying to think of a way to disturb the flow; to juxtapose the styles. Originally the coded parts were written in a simplistic English, but I decided that it just didn't work. Thanks for taking time to read; and I am glad that you were able to draw at least some enjoyment from (what is IMO) a fairly inaccessible poem.

[AprilRN1210]

I did enjoy... and a lot actually... it just took me taking the time to dig deeper and look.. your language is so rich and descriptive, how can someone not get lost in the beauty of it? I see your point with the flow.. I don't know what to tell you there. I agree it does need some kind of pauses in there to highlight the changes, just not sure what it should be... I don't think it is inaccessible.. I think it just takes someone actually taking the time to get lost in the vivid images you paint and "looking" where you lead us... again, nice job... yes, I enjoyed.. and... It was my pleasure:)

[Rick r]

Excellent form and technique. Love the binary code. At first I thought my firewall was blocking something. :) I'm not a huge fan of scifi in my reading, but this was captivating. Excellent work.
rick

[Ranger Kessel]

beautiful. wonderfully written poem. thanks:)

[~Artemis~]

Amazing. The use of binary adding an interesting element. It was amazing to me how you strung so many intricate and unique word together in a way that flowed so beautifully, You clearly have a mastery of the English language.

[Rachel Roth]

Unbelievable. I've never even read your writing and I can tell it's good. I've read a number of poems in the past but i think yours is comparable to that of one of my favorite authors. In other words, it's amazing.

[Lyn Anderson]

I wouldn't have gotten the whole story without the explanation, and I like my own idea anyway. But nonetheless, I love this interesting and well thought out piece, and the juxtaposition of the poem against the binary code is very neat. I enjoyed.