A Delicate Existence

It was an especially stinky day at Fred’s Fitness Buffet. This one-of-a-kind establishment for fitness-loving foodies employs possibly the world’s only vomit technicians - but more on that later. The brainchild of Fred, the fitness buffet takes the “rest” out of restaurant and is where people go to exercise their limbs, stomach, and taste buds all in one immersive experience.

Soon after opening, it was apparent that eating extravagantly while lifting weights or doing cardio was causing many patrons to lose their lunch. Fred adapted by hiring vomit technicians, or VTs as they were affectionately referred to, who keep the facility spick-and-span.

This particular day topped the heat and humidity charts in the town that houses Fred’s Fitness Buffet. Despite the best efforts of the VTs, the thick heat was intensifying the aura of the partially digested buffet rejections faster than they were able to fumigate the diverse scent.

Pioneers of their profession, the VTs started to ponder their career paths. Are we really the solution to this problem? We rarely see returning customers - are we not doing our jobs well enough? What gave Fred this idea in the first place? These are all questions the VTs asked themselves.

It was not long before Fred’s Fitness Buffet failed to bring in any customers at all. Thus, the art developed by these trail-blazing VTs was lost to history and extinguished, like a candle with a significant amount of wax remaining. Perhaps, just like a candle, an opportunity will arise in the near future for these stomach-acid artisans to relight the wick of their profession.