Feel it quick...

Under construction...

 Taking advantage of the pain while it's there

Crying the tears before they fade away

Taking a break from the constant numb

This pain means I'm alive

 

As much as it hurts-

I want to feel

Cause feeling and crying

Are the only times I'm real

Reviews

[Puella M. W.]

I like it! It celebrates the emotional part of our lives that makes us human.

One tiny thing, though maybe you did this on purpose, I dunno. The first two lines are addressing the reader; telling him/her to "take advantage" and "cry". The thrid line doesn't really fit in anywhere with the "ing" as in "taking"... but I like that. It makes the rhythm work nicely. And the last line of the first verse and the whole second verse suddenly switch into a first-person-narrative. Just seems a bit confusing...

But anyway, don't listen to me, I'm just a naive newbie who know ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about modern poetry.

;)

[TripleCK]

My Katydid!!! You make me feel so much better with your words... How they flow easily into my head. I want to cry because crying is an emotion & emotions are real... not just another part of a fake. I love all your writing & you are very good at it.